Don't Worry...Be Happy

Genuine Happiness Comes from Within

Sometimes, when we feel like the world is just too heavy, we look around and find people who continued to live fascinating and wonderful lives. And then thoughts come popping into our minds like bubbles from nowhere – “How did their life become so adorably sweet? How come they still can manage to laugh and play around despite a busy stressful life?” 

As we pause and observe for awhile we may realize that they started to work on a place called ‘self’.

So, how does one become genuinely happy? Step 1 is to love yourself.

A theology professor once said that “loving means accepting.”  To love oneself means to accept that you are not a perfect being, but behind the imperfections must lie a great ounce of courage to be able to discover ways on how to improve our repertoire to recover from our mistakes.

Genuine happiness also pertains to contentment. When you are contented with the job you have, the way you look, with your family, your friends, the place you live in, your car, and all the things you now have – truly, you know the answer to the question “how to be genuinely happy.”

When we begin to discover a small start somewhere from within, that small start will eventually lead to something else, and to something else. But if you keep questioning life like  and looking for the negative in everything, you will never be able to find genuine happiness.

I believe that life is about finding out about trying and failing, wining and losing, right and wrong. These are things that happen as often as you inhale and exhale. Failure in a person’s life has become as abundant and necessary as air. But this should not hinder us from becoming happy.

You may be at a down point in your life at the moment and wonder, how can we be genuinely happy in spite all these?

Take one step at a time.

Every time you exert an effort to improve the quality of life and your being, whether it is cleaning up your room, helping a friend, taking care of your sick dog, failing on board exams and trying again, life gives you equivalent points for that.

Imagine life as a big score board like those which are used in the NFLs. Every time you take a step forward, you make scoring points. Wouldn’t it be nice to look at that board at the end of each game and think to yourself “Whew! I got a point today. I’m glad I gave it a shot.”, instead of looking at it all blank and murmur “Geez, I didn’t even hit a score today. I wish I had the guts to try out. We could have won!” and then walk away.

Genuine happiness isn’t about driving the hottest Formula 1 car, nor getting the employee of the year award, earning the highest 13th month pay, or beating the sales quota. Sometimes, the most sought after prizes in life don’t always go to the fastest, the strongest, the bravest or not even the best.

So, how do you become genuinely happy? 

Every one has their own definition of ‘happiness’. Happiness for a writer may mean launching a best selling book. Happiness for a basketball rookie may mean getting the rookie of the year award. Happiness for a beggar may mean finding a lot of money. Happiness for a business man may mean corporate success.

So, really now, how do we become genuinely happy? Simple. Its about doing and making the best out of every single thing. You don’t have to have the best things in this world. When you find yourself smiling at your own mistake and telling your self “Oh, I’ll do better next time”, your willingness to stand up again and try – that will make you a genuinely happy person.

When you learn to accept yourself and your own faults. You pass step 1 in the project “how to become genuinely happy”.

Love and accept others as you love yourself.  Laugh at your foibles.  Be empathetic and kind to others.  Do something for someone else and do something for yourself.  Don't give so much away that you have nothing left for you.  It takes courage to be happy.  Be of good courage.

BANABU

Fran Watson

Promise Yourself

 

Promise yourself to be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.

To talk health, happiness and prosperity to every person you meet.

To make all your friends feel that there is something in them.

To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.

To think only of the best, to work only for the best and expect only the best.

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.

To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature you meet a smile.

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others.

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

Christian Daa Larson
1874-1954, New Thought Leader, Teacher, and Author

Point of View

Enjoy Your Life: Change Your Point of View


"Two men look out through the same bars: One sees the mud, and one sees the stars."
- Frederick Langbridge, A Cluster of Quiet Thoughts

What do you see when you look out your window?

If you’ve placed second in a contest, will you jump for joy and push for better results the next time or will you be discouraged and find an excuse not to join again?

Life is always filled with choices. You can choose to take a pessimist’s view and live a self-defeated life or you may decide to take a more optimistic route to a challenging and fulfilling life.

You may ask, "So why should I nurture an optimist’s point of view? And why now?"

Here is the reason.  Optimism has been linked to positive mood and good morale; to academic, athletic, military, occupational and political success; to popularity; to good health and even to long life and freedom from trauma.

On the other hand, as we read in the paper and see on the news, the rates of depression and pessimism have never been higher. It affects middle-aged adults the same way it hits younger people. The mean age of onset has gone from 30 to 15. It is no longer a middle-aged housewife’s disorder but also a teenager’s disorder’ as well.  Teenage suicides are on the rise.

Here’s how optimists are in action and research that backs up why it really pays to be an optimist:

Optimists expect the best

The defining characteristic of pessimists is that they tend to believe that the current bad events they are experiencing will last a long time and undermine everything they do, and that they are their own fault.

The truth is optimists are often confronted with the same difficulties. What differs is the way they look at and define their misfortune.  They tend to believe defeat is just a temporary setback, that its causes are confined to this one case. It all depends on your point of view.

Optimists tend to focus on and plan for the 'problem' at hand. They use 'positive reinterpretation.' In other words, they most likely reinterpret a negative experience in a way that helps them learn and grow. Such people see bad situations as a challenge and try harder.

They don’t say “things will never get better,” “If I failed once, it will happen again” and “If I experience misfortune in one part of my life, then it will happen in my whole life.”

Positive expectancies of optimists are also predictors of better reactions during transitions to new environments, sudden tragedies and unlikely turn of events. If they fall, they will stand up. They see opportunities instead of obstacles.

People respond positively to optimists

Optimism seems a socially desirable trait in all communities. Those who share optimism are generally accepted while those who spread gloom, panic and hysteria are treated unfavorably.

Optimists are proactive and less dependent on others for their happiness. They find no need to control or manipulate people. They usually draw people towards them. Their optimistic view of the world can be contagious and influence those they are with. 

In life, these people often win elections; get voted most congenial and sought for advice.

When the going gets tough, optimists get tougher

Optimists typically maintain higher levels of subjective well-being during times of stress than do people who are less optimistic. In contrast, pessimists are likely to react to stressful events by denying that they exist or by avoiding dealing with problems. Pessimists are more likely to quit trying when difficulties arise.

Optimists persevere. They just don’t give up easily.  They are patient, inching their way a step closer to that goal or elusive dream.

Optimists are healthier and live longer.  Medical research has demonstrated that simple pleasures and a positive outlook can cause a measurable increase in the body's ability to fight disease.  Optimists  age well and are much freer than most people from the usual physical ills of middle age. 

So why not be an optimist today? And think positively towards a more fulfilled life.

Why not look forward to success in all your endeavors? Why not be resilient? Like everybody else you are bound to hit lows sometimes but don’t just stay there. Carry yourself out of the mud and improve your chances of getting back on the right track. And why not inspire others to remove their dark-colored glasses and see life in the bright side?

To a brighter life

Fran Watson

P.S.  Click here for a powerpoint on Positive Attitude