Happiness -- Who Needs It?? How Do I Get It??

Be As Happy as You Want to Be

Almost everyone have heard the hit single 'Don't Worry, Be Happy' by Bobby McFerrin. The song has a very catchy way of conveying its message of being happy to everyone. Bobby Mcferiin's simple message surely made a lot of people by telling them not to worry.

Living a happy, resilient and optimistic life is wonderful, and is also good for your health. Being happy actually protects you from the stresses of life. Stress is linked to top causes of death such as heart disease, cancer and stroke.

One of the better things ever said is - 'The only thing in life that will always remain the same is change'. We have the power to make the necessary changes if we want to. Even if we find ourselves in an unbearable situation we can always find solace in the knowledge that it too can change.

Social networks or relationships are essential to happiness. People are different, accept people for who or what they are, avoid clashes, constant arguments, and let go of all kinds of resentments. If arguments seem unavoidable still try and make an effort to understand the situation and you might just get along well with the person.

Happiness is actually found in everyone, increasing it is a way to make a life more wonderful and also more healthy.

To be happy is relatively easy, just decide to be a happy person. Abraham Lincoln observed that most people for most of the time can choose how happy or stressed, how relaxed or troubled, how bright or dull their outlook will be. The choice is simple really, choose to be happy.

There are several ways by which you can do this.

Being grateful is a great attitude. We have so much to be thankful for. Thank the taxi driver for bringing you home safely, thank the cook for a wonderful dinner and thank the guy who cleans your windows. Also thank the mailman for bringing you your mail, thank the policeman for making your place safe and thank God for being alive.

News is stressful. Get less of it. Some people say they just can't start their day without their daily dose of news. Try and think about it, 99% of the news we hear or read is bad news. Starting the day with bad news does not seem to be a sensible thing to do.

A religious connection is also recommended. Being part of a religious group with its singing, sacraments, chanting, prayers and meditations foster inner peace.

Manage your time. Time is invaluable and too important to waste. Time management can be viewed as a list of rules that involves scheduling, setting goals, planning, creating lists of things to do and prioritizing. These are the core basics of time management that should be understood to develop an efficient personal time management skill. These basic skills can be fine tuned further to include the finer points of each skill that can give you that extra reserve to make the results you desire.

Laugh and laugh heartily everyday. Heard a good joke? Tell your friends or family about it. As they also say -'Laughter is the best medicine'.

Express your feelings, affections, friendship and passion to people around you. They will most likely reciprocate your actions. Try not to keep pent up anger or frustrations, this is bad for your health. Instead find ways of expressing them in a way that will not cause more injury or hurt to anyone.

Working hard brings tremendous personal satisfaction. It gives a feeling of being competent in finishing our tasks. Accomplishments are necessary for all of us, they give us a sense of value. Work on things that you feel worthy of your time.

Learning is a joyful exercise. Try and learn something new everyday. Learning also makes us expand and broaden our horizons. And could also give us more opportunities in the future.

Run, jog, walk and do other things that your body was made for. Feel alive.

Avoid exposure to negative elements like loud noises, toxins and hazardous places.

These are the few simple things you can do everyday to be happy.

As Abraham Lincoln, said, "Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."

So, be happy

Enjoy your life and make other people happy too.

Remember, it takes fewer muscles to smile than it does to frown

To your happiness

Fran Watson

Creating Your Reality

It’s really no secret that we create our own reality with out thoughts.  Everything that we are or have is with us because we’ve wanted it.  Whether it’s conscious or not, we bring things, people, and experiences to our lives with our way of thinking.  Like the verses in the bible that say “ask and ye shall receive”, our life follows the same message:  ask, believe and receive.

To begin we must clear our mind of all distracting thoughts, such as I need to clean the house, do the laundry, finish this project, etc..  We need to find a place where we can relax and really clear our mind.  This place is going to be the place where you can let your mind think and wander instead of JUST relaxing and letting go of your stress.  A place where you can think of your intentions in life or what you want and how you will get it.  It is important to make this place comfortable and inviting, so add a plant, a small water fountain, candles or whatever brings you peace.

Once you have found this place, you can begin to think about what you want or what gift you want to receive.  It is important to have no other thoughts when you begin to think about what you actually want.  It could be a million dollars, a doctorate, to be a famous musician or outstanding athlete, or any number of other things. 

We need to be clear with ourselves about what it is we want.  To excel, we must be specific.  If I say I want to lose weight, then just saying it is not specific enough.  I should say that I want to be healthy, live longer, eat less, and look better, and have a specific weight goal in mind, i.e. lose 10 pounds by a specific date. 

The next step is to believe that you will achieve your goal.  In order to achieve what you want, you’ll have a much better chance if you can visualize it.  Many times basketball coaches will tell young people to “visualize” the ball going into the basket in order to score.  It has been proven that imagining something is close to actually doing it.  If your thoughts and feelings are on the same level as what you want, you will raise your emotional bar and expand your imagination.  You have a great chance of being successful.  This is something that winning athletes do all the time.

Something else that is important to do is to express your gratitude.  Make a list of all the things you are grateful for; and that will open the door for more good things to come to you.  It will open your heart to give gratitude for the beautiful life that you have received.  Gratitude should be an enormous part of your life and should come as natural as breathing.

Once you’ve cleared your mind, decided what you wanted, visualized having it and expressed gratitude for what you have, your request is heard.  The details of how it will happen will then fall into place.  Make sure and stay positive by monitoring your feelings, but let go of trying to control things.

Whenever you start to feel down, sad or angry, quickly turn your feelings around so you will be surrounded by good, positive vibes.  Remember to stay positive and do something that helps you feel good.  Read a book, listen to music, walk in nature or anything else that will keep you inspired and feeling positive.

Continue to be patient if your dreams do not come true in hours, days or even months.  Just keep believing and sending out positive thoughts and feelings and continue to keep negative thoughts away.  Remember to be grateful and really enjoy your gift when you do receive it.  Surround yourself with the luxury of having the gift and enjoying it.  Make it part of your life, nurture it, and let it grow.  Look for the positive parts and always follow that path.  Enjoy your life and expect it to be good.

To your success

BANABU

Fran Watson

Building A New And Better (YO)U

"Who's the Boss?" 10 ways to start taking control (time management, goal setting, record tracking)

At first glance, it would seem that positive thinking and Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) have nothing to do with one another. But many people with ADD develop negative thinking patterns because we become frustrated by our challenges and frequent feelings of being overwhelmed. This negative outlook then makes it even harder to manage those challenges and move forward.

Practicing positive thinking allows people with ADD to focus on strengths and accomplishments, which increases happiness and motivation. This, in turn, allows more time for making progress, and less time feeling down and stuck. The following tips provide some practical suggestions that you can use to help you shift into more positive thinking patterns:

1. Take Good Care of Yourself
It's much easier to be positive when you are eating well, exercising, and getting enough rest.

2. Remind Yourself of the Things You Are Grateful For
Stresses and challenges don't seem quite as bad when you are constantly reminding yourself of the things that are right in life. Taking just 60 seconds a day to stop and appreciate the good things will make a huge difference.

3. Look for the Proof Instead of Making Assumptions
A fear of not being liked or accepted sometimes leads us to assume that we know what others are thinking, but our fears are usually not reality. If you have a fear that a friend or family member's bad mood is due to something you did, or that your co-workers are secretly gossiping about you when you turn your back, speak up and ask them. Don't waste time worrying that you did something wrong unless you have proof that there is something to worry about.

4. Refrain from Using Absolutes
Have you ever told a partner "You're ALWAYS late!" or complained to a friend "You NEVER call me!"? Thinking and speaking in absolutes like 'always' and 'never' makes the situation seem worse than it is, and programs your brain into believing that certain people are incapable of delivering.

5. Detach From Negative Thoughts
Your thoughts can't hold any power over you if you don't judge them. If you notice yourself having a negative thought, detach from it, witness it, and don't follow it.

6. Squash the "ANTs"
In his book "Change Your Brain, Change Your Life," Dr. Daniel Amen talks about "ANTs" - Automatic Negative Thoughts. These are the bad thoughts that are usually reactionary, like "Those people are laughing, they must be talking about me," or "The boss wants to see me? It must be bad!" When you notice these thoughts, realize that they are nothing more than ANTs and squash them!

7. Practice Lovin', Touchin' & Squeezin' (Your Friends and Family)
You don't have to be an expert to know the benefits of a good hug. Positive physical contact with friends, loved ones, and even pets, is an instant pick-me-up. One research study on this subject had a waitress touch some of her customers on the arm as she handed them their checks. She received higher tips from these customers than from the ones she didn't touch!

8. Increase Your Social Activity
By increasing social activity, you decrease loneliness. Surround yourself with healthy, happy people, and their positive energy will affect you in a positive way!

9. Volunteer for an Organization, or Help another Person
Everyone feels good after helping. You can volunteer your time, your money, or your resources. The more positive energy you put out into the world, the more you will receive in return.

10. Use Pattern Interrupts to Combat Rumination
If you find yourself ruminating on the negatives in your life, a great way to stop it is to interrupt the pattern and force yourself to do something completely different. Rumination is like hyper-focus on something negative. It's never productive, because it's not rational or solution-oriented, it's just excessive worry. Try changing your physical environment - go for a walk or sit outside. You could also call a friend, pick up a book, or turn on some music.

BANABU - To Building A New And Better Universe - A New And Better (YO)U

Fran Watson

Ten Commandments of Human Relations

1.      Speak to people.  There is nothing as nice as a cheerful word.

2.      Smile at people.  It takes 72 muscles to frown, only 14 to smile.

3.      Call people by name.  The sweetest music to anyone’s ears is the sound of his/her  name.

4.      Be friendly and helpful.  If you would have friends, be friendly.

5.      Be cordial.  Speak and act as if everything you do were a pleasure.

6.      Be genuinely interested in people.  You can like every body if you try.

7.      Be generous with praise – cautious with criticism.

8.      Be considerate with the feelings of others – it s appreciated.,

9.      Be thoughtful of the opinions of others – there are three sides to a controversy – yours, the other person’s and the right one.

10.  Be alert to give service.  What counts most in life is what we do for others.

Be kind to one another

Fran Watson

What Makes You Tick?

"What Really Makes You Tick?"

Some questions you should ask to yourself. 

Are you stuck?  Or are you somewhat contented with life the way things are, but think, "what if?" Then maybe it's time to ask yourself some hard questions.

1. What do I really want? - this is the toughest question. 
What would I do if I only had a little time left to live?  What would I do if I had all the money I wanted/needed and could do anything at all?

2. Should I really change?  If so, what should I change?  What parts of me do I like and what parts do I want to get rid of or minimize?

3. What's the bright side in all of this?  Is there a light at the end of the tunnel? 

4. Am I comfortable with what I'm doing?  Truthfully?

5. Have I done enough for myself?  Do you really look after yourself or are you looking after everyone else?  Do you take the time to eat properly, to exercise, to grow mentally, to spend time with friends who make you happy?

6. Am I happy at where I am today?  If not, then how can I change what is happening?

7. How much could I have?  How much do I want?  How much am I willing to work for it?

9. What motivates me?  What makes me so happy that time flies by, that hours seem like minutes?  What makes my heart race, my face smile and my insides fill with joy?  People, places, things??

So, What Really Makes You Tick?  This is not an easy question to answer, but when you get to the point where you can answer it, everything will begin to fall into place and you will know where it is you are going and how to get there.

Why not leave a comment below once you discover what makes you tick?  Let's see all the different answers that come up.

To ticking!!

Fran Watson

P.S.  What makes me tick is sharing what I learn with others.  One of the things I have done for the past 11 years is public speaking with Toastmasters.  Click here to find out more.

Help Give a Gift of Water

This year I'm going to turn a year older. And, this time, I'm actually wiser.

I learned that 800 million people on this planet still don't have access to clean drinking water, and I'm doing something about it.

This year, for my birthday I'd like to raise money for charity: water. You can help me.

Please donate $65 for my 65th birthday, and help me bring clean water to people in need.

Go to my campaign to donate: http://mycharitywater.org/birthday65

What's really cool is that 100% of the money we raise will directly fund water project costs in the field, and charity: water will prove every single dollar. When the project we help fund is complete, they'll send us a digital completion report with GPS coordinates and photos of the community we helped.  Here's an example.

I can't think of a better way to celebrate turning 65 than by giving the gift of clean water to people in need.

Please join me. http://mycharitywater.org/birthday65

Thank you for your support!
Fran
P.S. Read this story from charity: water to learn how clean water changes lives.

The Power of Thank You

Mark Hendricks believes in the spirit of BANABU as evidenced by this article he sent out. Although the date is 2010, the message is a forever one. I share it here with you and encourage you to share it with others.

The story of “Thank You” | appreciation
Jul.08, 2010 in Success and Motivation

The story of “Thank You”

A young man learns what’s most important in life from the guy next door.
It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls, career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams.

There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could stop him.

Over the phone, his mother told him, “Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday.” Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days.

“Jack, did you hear me?”

“Oh, sorry, Mom.. Yes, I heard you. It’s been so long since I thought of him. I’m sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago,” Jack said.

“Well, he didn’t forget you. Every time I saw him he’d ask how you were doing. He’d reminisce about the many days you spent over ‘his side of the fence’ as he put it,” Mom told him.

“I loved that old house he lived in,” Jack said.

“You know, Jack, after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man’s influence in your life,” she said

“He’s the one who taught me carpentry,” he said. “I wouldn’t be in this business if it weren’t for him. He spent a lot of time teaching me things he thought were important….Mom, I’ll be there for the funeral,” Jack said.

As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown. Mr. Belser’s funeral was small and uneventful. He had no children of his own, and most of his relatives had passed away.
The night before he had to return home, Jack and his Mom stopped by to see the old house next door one more time.

Standing in the doorway, Jack paused for a moment. It was like crossing over into another dimension, a leap through space and time The house was exactly as he remembered. Every step held memories. Every picture, every piece of furniture….Jack stopped suddenly.

“What’s wrong, Jack?” his Mom asked.

“The box is gone,” he said

“What box?” Mom asked.

“There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I must have asked him a thousand times what was inside. All he’d ever tell me was “the thing I value most,’” Jack said.

It was gone. Everything about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box. He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it.

“Now I’ll never know what was so valuable to him,” Jack said. “I better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom.”

It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died Returning home from work one day Jack discovered a note in his mailbox. “Signature required on a package. No one at home. Please stop by the main post office within the next three days,” the note read.

Early the next day Jack retrieved the package. The small box was old and looked like it had been mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention. “Mr. Harold Belser” it read. Jack took the box out to his car and ripped open the package. There inside was the gold box and an envelope. Jack’s hands shook as he read the note inside.

“Upon my death, please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It’s the thing I valued most in my life.” A small key was taped to the letter. His heart racing, as tears filling his eyes, Jack carefully unlocked the box. There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch.

Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover. Inside he found these words engraved:

“Jack, Thanks for your time! -Harold Belser.”

“The thing he valued most was…my time”

Jack held the watch for a few minutes, then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next two days. “Why?” Janet, his assistant asked.

“I need some time to spend with my son,” he said.

“Oh, by the way, Janet, thanks for your time!”

“Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away,”

Think about this. You may not realize it, but it’s 100% true.

1. At least 2 people in this world love you so much they would die for you.

2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.

3. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don’t like you.

4. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.

5. You mean the world to someone.

6. If not for you, someone may not be living.

7. You are special and unique.

8. When you think you have no chance of getting what you want, you probably won’t get it, but if you trust God to do what’s best, and wait on His time, sooner or later, you will get it or something better.

9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good can still come from it.

10. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely turned your back on the world.

11. Someone that you don’t even know exists loves you.

12. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.

13. Always tell someone how you feel about them; you will feel much better when they know and you’ll both be happy.

14. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that they are great.

Send this letter to all the people you care about, if you do so, you will certainly brighten someone’s day and might change their perspective on life…for the better.

To everyone I sent this to “Thanks for your time”.
Your friend,
Mark Hendricks


Thank you for reading my blog - have a wonderful day and a wonderful year!

Fran

www.franwatson.ca