Do you believe that you have to wait until things calm down a bit before you get your act together?
Do you keep telling yourself that tomorrow you will get at that chore you’ve been putting off, that course you’ve been wanting to take, that phone call you’ve been going to make, take some time to look after yourself, go to the spa, take a hot bath, etc. etc.?
Well then, you are normal. Most of us are waiting until tomorrow, but the truth is, as Sarah Ban Breathnach says, “life never calms down long enough for us to wait until tomorrow to start living the lives we deserve. Life is always movement, always change, always unforeseen circumstances.”
So, what are our options? How do we begin working on this life of ours to make it more satisfying? Sarah says “We can accept, bless, give thanks, and get going. “ Wow, what a concept. Accept things as they are. Give thanks for our circumstances and then just get on with things.
As I read the thought for January 25th from Sarah Ban Brethnach’s Simple Abundance, A Daybook of Comfort and Joy, I was struck by how many things I have let slide. How many times procrastination has crept in and how many opportunities this has cost me. How many times have you had a thought, “I should call so and so”, but then let it slide only to find out later that something happened to that person, they moved away, or they died and that opportunity will never come again. How many friendships have you let slide? How many times have you turned down the chance to do something just for yourself – taking a nice long bath for instance. I can hear you now - “Oh, I couldn’t do that, there is laundry to do, dishes to be done, the house to clean, etc., etc., etc.” Well, those things will always be there. It’s time to stop making excuses. You will NEVER FIND THE TIME to do anything. You need to MAKE THE TIME to do what it is you want to do.
Sarah encouraged me to “Call a friend for lunch, begin to read or even write that novel, organize your papers, try a new recipe for dinner, smile at everyone you meet, sit and dream before a blazing fire, pick up your needlepoint again, act as if you’re grateful to be alive, scatter joy.” Simple things to get us started on LIVING out life instead of letting it pass us by.
Now it is your turn. Think for a moment about one thing that you can do that will bring you genuine pleasure…and then do it.
Think about one thing that will move your business forward…and then do it.
Think about one thing that will improve your relationship (if you are in one)….and then do it.
Simple things, and easy to do…IF we just go ahead and do them.
What will you do today????
Fran Watson
Showing posts with label philosophy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label philosophy. Show all posts
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Success
If you wait for everything to be perfect according to your preconceived plans, then you may well wait forever. If you go out and work with the current of life, you may find that success comes from building upon small things.
-- Deng Ming-Dao, Writer
There are powers inside of you which, if you could discover and use, would make of you everythng you ever dreamed or imagined you could become.
-- Orison Sweet Marden (1850 - 1924), Founder of Success magazine
Talent is never enough. With a few exceptions, the best players are the hardest workers.
-- Earvin "Magic" Johnson, Professional basketball player
Words to live by, and perhaps words that may inspire you to live well.
Live wisely, listen carefully, speak positively and have a wonderful day.
Fran Watson
www.franwatson.ca
Friday, October 17, 2008
The Secret Masters
I'm sure by now you're aware that hundreds... maybe even thousands of "teachers" around the globe are touting The Secret as the next best thing to getting into Heaven.
But none of these hard-core Secret fans seem to know that some of the most vitally important... crucial knowledge... has been kept from them... actually stripped from the movie!
This information has unlocked the doors to manifesting riches, cars, houses, food and financial freedom for those few individuals who know the real secret... want to know what it is?... I'll give you a hint:
http://www.mastersofthesecret.com/?join=10795
You'll only find out from the web site above.
Why?... Because some of the exact same teachers of The Secret (from the movie) are together once again, this time in a project that exposes the lies, deceit and deception about metaphysics, spirituality and manifestation that seem to rule the world of the mainstream audience.
No wonder there are so many skeptics of The Secret... they clearly see the holes that were never filled in the movie's lush "new age" philosophy... until now!
Click Here and See This Now:
http://www.mastersofthesecret.com/?join=10795
Sincerely,
Fran
PS. I'll warn you... this isn't for everyone. Some folks will be offended, others may cry... but all will know the REAL Secret that you were never supposed to hear!
****************************************************
But none of these hard-core Secret fans seem to know that some of the most vitally important... crucial knowledge... has been kept from them... actually stripped from the movie!
This information has unlocked the doors to manifesting riches, cars, houses, food and financial freedom for those few individuals who know the real secret... want to know what it is?... I'll give you a hint:
http://www.mastersofthesecret.com/?join=10795
You'll only find out from the web site above.
Why?... Because some of the exact same teachers of The Secret (from the movie) are together once again, this time in a project that exposes the lies, deceit and deception about metaphysics, spirituality and manifestation that seem to rule the world of the mainstream audience.
No wonder there are so many skeptics of The Secret... they clearly see the holes that were never filled in the movie's lush "new age" philosophy... until now!
Click Here and See This Now:
http://www.mastersofthesecret.com/?join=10795
Sincerely,
Fran
PS. I'll warn you... this isn't for everyone. Some folks will be offended, others may cry... but all will know the REAL Secret that you were never supposed to hear!
****************************************************
Fast Action Bonus #1 | |
 | Get your hands on Masters of the Secret. This is a $197 value and worth the price of this package alone.
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Monday, October 13, 2008
Perceptions
PERCEPTIONS
How was your latest car wash experience?
Did you take your car to a do-it-yourself car wash where you could ensure that every spot that needed to be cleaned was clean?
Did you approach the car wash cautiously, checking your windows 2 and 3 times to ensure that they were firmly secure so that no water could come inside? Then carefully ease your car up to the marked line and then wait - feeling powers beyond your control begin to move your car forward and then feel trapped inside when the thunderous rush of water, soap and brushes hit your car from all directions?
Or did you cheerfully approach the car wash, deposit your coins and gently guide your car into the tracks calmly and serenely.
Did you wonder if you were going to get stuck in the middle and be unable to get out? Did you wonder if the machinery would break down? Did you wonder if your windows Or did you sit back comfortably in your warm cocoon, knowing that you were in good hands and that the machinery was there simply to wash away the dirt and the grime to leave your car clean and ready to go again?
I was at my mom's a couple of weeks ago. Mom likes her car clean, but doesn't feel comfortable doing it on her own - well, she is over 80, so I guess that's why. As I was taking her car through the car wash, I thought about the various car wash experiences, and realized how this experience applies to our daily lives.
Some people see their lives as out of their control. They feel buffeted about by the trials and tribulations of life. They approach it with fear and trepidation, wondering what will hit them next. They are constantly looking around, waiting for the next blow.
Others see that they have set things in motion, that they are on the right track as they pass through life, and that the forces that buffet them are simply there to clean away the debris, leaving them refreshed and ready to carry on with a clean slate.
For those that like the do-it-yourself car wash, and I confess, I am one, our lives are probably much more controlled. We are not content to be on a pre-set track. We may be highly competitive. We may have to be number one. We may have to, as Frank Sinatra said "do it my way." Some of us may not be content to work for someone else, we have to be entrepreneurs so that we can guide our life in the way that we want it to be go. And we ensure that all the specks are removed, that there is nothing hindering us, that there is nothing in our way. It's all in how we perceive our life.
The same situation is often viewed very differently by people in each of these groups. That's why even "eye witness" accounts vary so much. Everyone has heard the question - is the glass half full or is it half empty? Do we look at what's missing - what we don't have, or do we consider the benefits and blessings we do have? Now my oldest son likes to say - "It depends on whether you are filling it up, or drinking it". However, most of us would have a set response. For those who have the scary car wash experience, they may see the glass and their life as half empty and out of their control. For people who see the glass as half full, they probably have a good car wash experience. They are content, calm, ready to travel on with life.
The way we look at things changes how we feel about what goes on in our lives, and how we deal with things. When it comes to employment, some people have a perception that a person without a grade 12 education is not worth hiring, yet there are a number of very successful businessmen, some even millionaires, who have less than a grade 8 education, but more smarts than a university graduate.
In the job search - if you think you won't get a job, your body image changes and the employer's perception of you and your abilities may be affected by this. Try this: Let your shoulders hunch forward, hang your head a little and say "I feel great". It's almost impossible to feel great when your posture says I feel lousy. Next, take a deep breath, put your shoulders back, your head up, a smile on your face and say, "I feel great". This time when you say it, you'll mean it. When you change the image, you also change the perception - both for yourself and the employer.
Our perceptions of events are coloured by the way we think, by the way we perceive life. I know a woman who has a beautiful home, an expensive car, fairly expensive clothes and she owns a company. People perceive her as being very rich. What they don't know is that her house is heavily mortgaged and that she has extensive credit card debt, and the clothes that she is wearing are probably 15-20 years old, purchased at a time when she had a little more money. But it is difficult to change people's perceptions. Someone else might be seen as incredibly poor, living in a tiny shack of a house, not driving the latest car, but that person may be very, very content with what they have. So, while others perceive them as being poor, they may see themselves as very, very rich.
Think about your perceptions. Are you full of hope? Or hopeless? Even the worst situations can have a positive side if we look for the silver lining. For those with a hopeless perspective, this is much more difficult as all they can see are the storm clouds. These people may need help to see that the sun always comes out eventually and that there is always another day, another chance to change things, to wash away the troubles of life.
It's up to the hope full people to lead the way. I challenge you to view life with a positive perspective. To look for the lesson in life's difficulties so that you can share what you've learned with others, so they too can survive and grow from their car wash experiences.
Fran Watson
How was your latest car wash experience?
Did you take your car to a do-it-yourself car wash where you could ensure that every spot that needed to be cleaned was clean?
Did you approach the car wash cautiously, checking your windows 2 and 3 times to ensure that they were firmly secure so that no water could come inside? Then carefully ease your car up to the marked line and then wait - feeling powers beyond your control begin to move your car forward and then feel trapped inside when the thunderous rush of water, soap and brushes hit your car from all directions?
Or did you cheerfully approach the car wash, deposit your coins and gently guide your car into the tracks calmly and serenely.
Did you wonder if you were going to get stuck in the middle and be unable to get out? Did you wonder if the machinery would break down? Did you wonder if your windows Or did you sit back comfortably in your warm cocoon, knowing that you were in good hands and that the machinery was there simply to wash away the dirt and the grime to leave your car clean and ready to go again?
I was at my mom's a couple of weeks ago. Mom likes her car clean, but doesn't feel comfortable doing it on her own - well, she is over 80, so I guess that's why. As I was taking her car through the car wash, I thought about the various car wash experiences, and realized how this experience applies to our daily lives.
Some people see their lives as out of their control. They feel buffeted about by the trials and tribulations of life. They approach it with fear and trepidation, wondering what will hit them next. They are constantly looking around, waiting for the next blow.
Others see that they have set things in motion, that they are on the right track as they pass through life, and that the forces that buffet them are simply there to clean away the debris, leaving them refreshed and ready to carry on with a clean slate.
For those that like the do-it-yourself car wash, and I confess, I am one, our lives are probably much more controlled. We are not content to be on a pre-set track. We may be highly competitive. We may have to be number one. We may have to, as Frank Sinatra said "do it my way." Some of us may not be content to work for someone else, we have to be entrepreneurs so that we can guide our life in the way that we want it to be go. And we ensure that all the specks are removed, that there is nothing hindering us, that there is nothing in our way. It's all in how we perceive our life.
The same situation is often viewed very differently by people in each of these groups. That's why even "eye witness" accounts vary so much. Everyone has heard the question - is the glass half full or is it half empty? Do we look at what's missing - what we don't have, or do we consider the benefits and blessings we do have? Now my oldest son likes to say - "It depends on whether you are filling it up, or drinking it". However, most of us would have a set response. For those who have the scary car wash experience, they may see the glass and their life as half empty and out of their control. For people who see the glass as half full, they probably have a good car wash experience. They are content, calm, ready to travel on with life.
The way we look at things changes how we feel about what goes on in our lives, and how we deal with things. When it comes to employment, some people have a perception that a person without a grade 12 education is not worth hiring, yet there are a number of very successful businessmen, some even millionaires, who have less than a grade 8 education, but more smarts than a university graduate.
In the job search - if you think you won't get a job, your body image changes and the employer's perception of you and your abilities may be affected by this. Try this: Let your shoulders hunch forward, hang your head a little and say "I feel great". It's almost impossible to feel great when your posture says I feel lousy. Next, take a deep breath, put your shoulders back, your head up, a smile on your face and say, "I feel great". This time when you say it, you'll mean it. When you change the image, you also change the perception - both for yourself and the employer.
Our perceptions of events are coloured by the way we think, by the way we perceive life. I know a woman who has a beautiful home, an expensive car, fairly expensive clothes and she owns a company. People perceive her as being very rich. What they don't know is that her house is heavily mortgaged and that she has extensive credit card debt, and the clothes that she is wearing are probably 15-20 years old, purchased at a time when she had a little more money. But it is difficult to change people's perceptions. Someone else might be seen as incredibly poor, living in a tiny shack of a house, not driving the latest car, but that person may be very, very content with what they have. So, while others perceive them as being poor, they may see themselves as very, very rich.
Think about your perceptions. Are you full of hope? Or hopeless? Even the worst situations can have a positive side if we look for the silver lining. For those with a hopeless perspective, this is much more difficult as all they can see are the storm clouds. These people may need help to see that the sun always comes out eventually and that there is always another day, another chance to change things, to wash away the troubles of life.
It's up to the hope full people to lead the way. I challenge you to view life with a positive perspective. To look for the lesson in life's difficulties so that you can share what you've learned with others, so they too can survive and grow from their car wash experiences.
Fran Watson
Time Management
Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.
- H. Jackson Brown
Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.
-- Native American Proverb
You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present.
-- Jan Glidewell
- H. Jackson Brown
Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.
-- Native American Proverb
You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present.
-- Jan Glidewell
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Think Right Now!
===================================================
Out Of Every Thousand People...
The most organized person will achieve the most, do it faster with the least amount of effort AND have the most free time...
Learn NOW how simple & easy it is to be that one in a thousand.
==> http://www.thinkrightnow.com/cmd.asp?Clk=2547468
===================================================
DO YOU SET GOALS BUT RARELY REACH & KEEP THEM?
I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE THE LAZIEST PERSON ALIVE...
If you just can't get yourself to do what you must do, if
your willpower and persistence always seems to fizzle out,
then join people from 54 countries who are now using the
new paradigm in personal growth. Free course. Join the
single largest personal coaching ezine in the world.
Click here to learn about it all...
http://www.thinkrightnow.com/cmd.asp?Clk=2547492
===================================================
CHANGE YOUR LIFE... JUST BY LOOKING AT YOUR PC MONITOR
Think Right Now For Windows makes
every computer minute an effortless self-help session.
Just use your PC as you always do. That's it!
Learn more now...
http://www.thinkrightnow.com/cmd.asp?Clk=2547470
*************************************************
Decide What You Want
In order to get what you want, you must first decide what you want. Most people really foul up at this crucial first step because they simply can't see how it's possible to get what they want - so they don't even let themselves want it.
Don't sabotage yourself that way!
What scientists now know about how the brain works is that you must first decide WHAT you want, before your brain can figure out HOW to get it. Once you lock-in your desires, your mind and the universe can step in.
Are you ready to get started?
Be Willing to Dream BIG Dreams
As soon as you commit to a big dream and really go after it, your subconscious creative mind will come up with big ideas to make it happen. You'll start attracting the people, resources, and opportunities you need into your life to make your dream come true. Big dreams not only inspire you, they compel others to want to play big, too.
Set Goals That Will Stretch You
Another value in giving yourself permission to go after the big dreams is that big dreams require you to grow in order to achieve them. In fact, in the long run, that is the greatest benefit you will receive from pursuing your dreams - not so much the outer trappings of fulfilling the dream (an expensive car, impressive house, loads of money and philanthropic opportunities), but who you become in the process.
As I've seen many times over, the outer symbols of success can all be easily lost. Houses burn down, companies go bankrupt, relationships end, cars get old, bodies age and fame wanes, but who you are, what you have learned, and the new skills you have developed never go away. These are the true prizes of success. Motivational philosopher, Jim Rohn advises that "You should set a goal big enough that in the process of achieving it, you become someone worth becoming."
Service to Others
Something else you'll discover is that when your dreams include service to others - accomplishing something that contributes to others - it also accelerates the accomplishment of that goal. People want to be part of something that contributes and makes a difference.
Turn Your Dreams into Goals and Objectives
Once you are clear about what you want, you must turn each item into a measurable objective. By measurable, I mean measurable in space and time - how much and by when. For instance, if you were to tell me that you wanted more money, I might pull out a dollar and give it to you, but you would probably protest, saying "No, I meant a lot more money - like $20,000!" Well, how am I supposed to know unless you tell me? Similarly, your boss, your friends, your spouse, your brain - God, the Universe - can't figure out what you want unless you tell them specifically what it is. What do you want - exactly - and when do you want it by?
Write Your Goals Down
Write your goals down in detail, and read your list of goals every day. This will keep your subconscious mind focused on what you want. For an even more powerful approach, close your eyes and focus on each goal and ask yourself, "What is one thing I could do today to move toward the achievement of this goal?" Write down your answers and take those actions.
I recommend writing down a minimum of 3 goals in each of the following 7 areas:
Financial Goals
Career/Business Goals
Free Time/Family Time
Health/Appearance Goals
Relationship Goals
Personal Growth
Making a Difference
To help your reticular activating system begin finding YOUR wants in unexpected places, take time now to decide what you want and start writing!
If you want help getting started, I have a handy worksheet for you that models this formula, including examples. Click here to download this resource and start creating all that you want from your life this year.
Remember, don't hold back!
***author Jack Canfield
Cme on, take that first step towards your personal success.
Fran Watson
Out Of Every Thousand People...
The most organized person will achieve the most, do it faster with the least amount of effort AND have the most free time...
Learn NOW how simple & easy it is to be that one in a thousand.
==> http://www.thinkrightnow.com/cmd.asp?Clk=2547468
===================================================
DO YOU SET GOALS BUT RARELY REACH & KEEP THEM?
I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE THE LAZIEST PERSON ALIVE...
If you just can't get yourself to do what you must do, if
your willpower and persistence always seems to fizzle out,
then join people from 54 countries who are now using the
new paradigm in personal growth. Free course. Join the
single largest personal coaching ezine in the world.
Click here to learn about it all...
http://www.thinkrightnow.com/cmd.asp?Clk=2547492
===================================================
CHANGE YOUR LIFE... JUST BY LOOKING AT YOUR PC MONITOR
Think Right Now For Windows makes
every computer minute an effortless self-help session.
Just use your PC as you always do. That's it!
Learn more now...
http://www.thinkrightnow.com/cmd.asp?Clk=2547470
*************************************************
Decide What You Want
In order to get what you want, you must first decide what you want. Most people really foul up at this crucial first step because they simply can't see how it's possible to get what they want - so they don't even let themselves want it.
Don't sabotage yourself that way!
What scientists now know about how the brain works is that you must first decide WHAT you want, before your brain can figure out HOW to get it. Once you lock-in your desires, your mind and the universe can step in.
Are you ready to get started?
Be Willing to Dream BIG Dreams
As soon as you commit to a big dream and really go after it, your subconscious creative mind will come up with big ideas to make it happen. You'll start attracting the people, resources, and opportunities you need into your life to make your dream come true. Big dreams not only inspire you, they compel others to want to play big, too.
Set Goals That Will Stretch You
Another value in giving yourself permission to go after the big dreams is that big dreams require you to grow in order to achieve them. In fact, in the long run, that is the greatest benefit you will receive from pursuing your dreams - not so much the outer trappings of fulfilling the dream (an expensive car, impressive house, loads of money and philanthropic opportunities), but who you become in the process.
As I've seen many times over, the outer symbols of success can all be easily lost. Houses burn down, companies go bankrupt, relationships end, cars get old, bodies age and fame wanes, but who you are, what you have learned, and the new skills you have developed never go away. These are the true prizes of success. Motivational philosopher, Jim Rohn advises that "You should set a goal big enough that in the process of achieving it, you become someone worth becoming."
Service to Others
Something else you'll discover is that when your dreams include service to others - accomplishing something that contributes to others - it also accelerates the accomplishment of that goal. People want to be part of something that contributes and makes a difference.
Turn Your Dreams into Goals and Objectives
Once you are clear about what you want, you must turn each item into a measurable objective. By measurable, I mean measurable in space and time - how much and by when. For instance, if you were to tell me that you wanted more money, I might pull out a dollar and give it to you, but you would probably protest, saying "No, I meant a lot more money - like $20,000!" Well, how am I supposed to know unless you tell me? Similarly, your boss, your friends, your spouse, your brain - God, the Universe - can't figure out what you want unless you tell them specifically what it is. What do you want - exactly - and when do you want it by?
Write Your Goals Down
Write your goals down in detail, and read your list of goals every day. This will keep your subconscious mind focused on what you want. For an even more powerful approach, close your eyes and focus on each goal and ask yourself, "What is one thing I could do today to move toward the achievement of this goal?" Write down your answers and take those actions.
I recommend writing down a minimum of 3 goals in each of the following 7 areas:
Financial Goals
Career/Business Goals
Free Time/Family Time
Health/Appearance Goals
Relationship Goals
Personal Growth
Making a Difference
To help your reticular activating system begin finding YOUR wants in unexpected places, take time now to decide what you want and start writing!
If you want help getting started, I have a handy worksheet for you that models this formula, including examples. Click here to download this resource and start creating all that you want from your life this year.
Remember, don't hold back!
***author Jack Canfield
Cme on, take that first step towards your personal success.
Fran Watson
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Points to Ponder
Points to Ponder
If you were to FULLY live your life, what is the first change you would start to make?
What's one change you could make to your lifestyle that would give you more peace?
For your life to be perfect, what would have to change?
What do you really, really want?
Fran
If you were to FULLY live your life, what is the first change you would start to make?
What's one change you could make to your lifestyle that would give you more peace?
For your life to be perfect, what would have to change?
What do you really, really want?
Fran
Monday, July 28, 2008
11 Beliefs That Will Not Cause Harm
ELEVEN BELIEFS THAT WILL NOT CAUSE PROBLEMS
1. EVERYBODY DOESN’T HAVE TO LOVE ME
Not everybody has to love me, or even like me. I don’t necessarily like everybody I know, so why should everybody else like me? I enjoy being liked and being loved, but if somebody doesn’t like me, I will still be O.K. and still feel like I am an O.K. person. I cannot “make” somebody like me any more than someone can get me to like them. I don’t need approval all the time. If someone does not approve of me, I will still be O.K.
2. IT IS O.K. TO MAKE MISTAKES
It is O.K. to make a mistake. Making mistakes is something we all do, and I am still a fine and worthwhile person when I make mistakes. There is no reason for me to get upset when I make a mistake. I am trying, and if I make a mistake, I am going to continue trying. I can handle making a mistake. It is O.K. for others to make mistakes, too. I will accept mistakes in myself and also mistakes that others make.
3. OTHER PEOPLE ARE O.K. AND I AM O.K.
People who do things I don’t like are not necessarily bad people. They should not necessarily be punished just because I don’t like what they do or did. There is no reason why another person should be the way I want them to be, and there is no reason why I should be the way somebody else wants me to be. I cannot control other people, or change them. They are who they are; we all deserve basic respect and reasonable treatment.
4. I DON’T HAVE TO CONTROL THINGS
I will survive if things are different than what I want them to be. I can accept things the way they are, accept people they way they are, and accept myself the way I am. There is no reason to get upset if I can’t change things to fit my idea of how they ought to be. There is no reason why I should have to like everything. Even if I don’t like it, I can live with it.
5. I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR MY DAY
I am responsible for how I feel, and for what I do. Nobody can make me feel anything. If I have a rotten day, I am the one who allowed it to be that way. If I have a great day, I am the one who deserves credit for being positive. It is not the responsibility of other people to change so that I can feel better. I am the one who is in charge of my life.
6. I CAN HANDLE IT WHEN THINGS GO WRONG
I don’t need to watch out for things to go wrong. Things usually go just fine, and when they don’t, I can handle it. I don’t have to waste my energy worrying. The sky won’t fall in; things will be O.K.
7. IT IS IMPORTANT TO TRY
I can. Even though I may be faced with difficult tasks, it is better to try than to avoid them. Avoiding a task does not give me any opportunities for success or joy, but trying does. Things worth having are worth the effort. I might not be able to do everything, but I can do something.
8. I AM CAPABLE
I don’t need someone else to take care of my problems. I am capable. I can take care of myself. I can make decisions for myself…I can think for myself. I don’t have to depend on somebody else to take care of me.
9. I CAN CHANGE
I can change. I don’t have to be a certain way because of what has happened in the past. Every day is a new day. It is silly to think I can’t help being the way I am. Of course I can.
10. OTHER PEOPLE ARE CAPABLE
I can’t solve other people’s problems for them. I don’t have to take on other people’s problems as if they were my own. I don’t need to change other people, or fix up their lives. They are capable and can take care of themselves, and can solve their own problems. I can care and be of some help, but I can’t do everything for them.
11. I CAN BE FLEXIBLE
There is more than one way to do something. More than one person has good ideas that will work. There is no one and only “best” way. Everybody has ideas that are worthwhile. Some may make more sense to me than others, but everyone’s ideas are worthwhile, and everyone has something worthwhile to contribute.
From: Thinking, Changing, Rearranging
By Jill Anderson
Believe!!
Fran
1. EVERYBODY DOESN’T HAVE TO LOVE ME
Not everybody has to love me, or even like me. I don’t necessarily like everybody I know, so why should everybody else like me? I enjoy being liked and being loved, but if somebody doesn’t like me, I will still be O.K. and still feel like I am an O.K. person. I cannot “make” somebody like me any more than someone can get me to like them. I don’t need approval all the time. If someone does not approve of me, I will still be O.K.
2. IT IS O.K. TO MAKE MISTAKES
It is O.K. to make a mistake. Making mistakes is something we all do, and I am still a fine and worthwhile person when I make mistakes. There is no reason for me to get upset when I make a mistake. I am trying, and if I make a mistake, I am going to continue trying. I can handle making a mistake. It is O.K. for others to make mistakes, too. I will accept mistakes in myself and also mistakes that others make.
3. OTHER PEOPLE ARE O.K. AND I AM O.K.
People who do things I don’t like are not necessarily bad people. They should not necessarily be punished just because I don’t like what they do or did. There is no reason why another person should be the way I want them to be, and there is no reason why I should be the way somebody else wants me to be. I cannot control other people, or change them. They are who they are; we all deserve basic respect and reasonable treatment.
4. I DON’T HAVE TO CONTROL THINGS
I will survive if things are different than what I want them to be. I can accept things the way they are, accept people they way they are, and accept myself the way I am. There is no reason to get upset if I can’t change things to fit my idea of how they ought to be. There is no reason why I should have to like everything. Even if I don’t like it, I can live with it.
5. I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR MY DAY
I am responsible for how I feel, and for what I do. Nobody can make me feel anything. If I have a rotten day, I am the one who allowed it to be that way. If I have a great day, I am the one who deserves credit for being positive. It is not the responsibility of other people to change so that I can feel better. I am the one who is in charge of my life.
6. I CAN HANDLE IT WHEN THINGS GO WRONG
I don’t need to watch out for things to go wrong. Things usually go just fine, and when they don’t, I can handle it. I don’t have to waste my energy worrying. The sky won’t fall in; things will be O.K.
7. IT IS IMPORTANT TO TRY
I can. Even though I may be faced with difficult tasks, it is better to try than to avoid them. Avoiding a task does not give me any opportunities for success or joy, but trying does. Things worth having are worth the effort. I might not be able to do everything, but I can do something.
8. I AM CAPABLE
I don’t need someone else to take care of my problems. I am capable. I can take care of myself. I can make decisions for myself…I can think for myself. I don’t have to depend on somebody else to take care of me.
9. I CAN CHANGE
I can change. I don’t have to be a certain way because of what has happened in the past. Every day is a new day. It is silly to think I can’t help being the way I am. Of course I can.
10. OTHER PEOPLE ARE CAPABLE
I can’t solve other people’s problems for them. I don’t have to take on other people’s problems as if they were my own. I don’t need to change other people, or fix up their lives. They are capable and can take care of themselves, and can solve their own problems. I can care and be of some help, but I can’t do everything for them.
11. I CAN BE FLEXIBLE
There is more than one way to do something. More than one person has good ideas that will work. There is no one and only “best” way. Everybody has ideas that are worthwhile. Some may make more sense to me than others, but everyone’s ideas are worthwhile, and everyone has something worthwhile to contribute.
From: Thinking, Changing, Rearranging
By Jill Anderson
Believe!!
Fran
Monday, July 21, 2008
Out of Balance??
Here is an article by one of my colleagues. I hope you enjoy it.
Lenny's Tip For The Day: Don't replace the garage door!
For weeks, every time Lenny and Kathy would back the car out of the garage to leave the house, the remote-controlled garage door would shake, hit a certain point, then bounce back open again. After multiple attempts to close the door (hitting the remote control at just the right time, getting out of the car and pulling down the door by hand, or the ultimate - performing the complex, "Please, please close now" ritual) somehow, it would eventually shut.
One day, after 10 frustrating tries to close the door, Kathy resorted to calling a repair shop and asking them to come look at the door. The next day a technician arrived. After assessing the situation he said, "Ma'am, you need a new garage door. This one is old, worn out, and coming off the tracks."
Given his recommendation, and her own level of aggravation, Kathy felt she had no other choice than to replace the door.
Later that same day, Kathy's next-door neighbor came for a visit and Kathy mentioned the broken garage door. The neighbor asked to take a look and after he did he said, "Kathy, you don't need a new door. The door is just out of balance. It just needs something to stabilize it." He returned a few minutes later with a metal bar and attached it to the top of the door. It was like magic. The door opened and closed with ease!
Lenny has observed humans and has noticed that they sometimes allow their lives to get out of balance, without even realizing that a lack of balance is the source of their problems. Sometimes balance shifts through overuse, lack of maintenance, or inattention and that makes people begin to get off track. Often times, just making a small life adjustment will help stabilize us, get us functioning and working again with ease!
Lenny's Challenge: Take 60 seconds and ask yourself, "Am I out of balance? Working to hard? Not spending enough time with my family and loved ones? Not taking enough time for myself? What is one thing I can do today to make an adjustment that will help stabilize my life and bring it back on track and into balance?" Before you decide to "buy a new door," how can you learn to recognize your own state of balance?
Staying balanced is 100% your choice! Shed or You're Dead (TM)!
***************************************************************************************************************************************************************
Announcing NEW BRIDGES program!
Kathy Dempsey has partnered with Bob Danzig, former CEO of Hearst Newspapers, to bring you a new spirit-driven leadership program called Bridges - Connecting the spirit, commitment, and morale of your colleagues to your organization's noble purpose. Visit www.TheLearningAgenda.com for more information.
Order Kathy's new book, Shed or You're Dead (TM): 31 unConventional Strategies for Growth and Change (recipient of a Writer's Digest International Book Award). It makes a great gift for family, friends, colleagues, or staff! Do you know someone who needs a few strategies to get unstuck and grow? To order personalized and autographed copies, visit www.TheLearningAgenda.com or call 302-765-3301. Shed or You're Dead (TM) is $15.95. Free shipping to the first 10 people who mention this message! Order five or more copies and get 30% off the cover price.
Does your organization need a little help shedding? Looking for a speaker or trainer for your next meeting? Need help in 2004 with strategic planning? Kathy and Lenny's facilitated programs might be just what you need. Email Info@TheLearningAgenda.com or visit www.TheLearningAgenda.com for more details.
Recommend 60 Seconds of Shedding to a friend by sending them to www.KeepShedding.com to sign up for their own subscription.
Kathy B Dempsey - www.TheLearningAgenda.com - 302-765-3301 - Kathy@TheLearningAgenda.com
TheLearningAgenda.com - Helping individuals and organizations grow by "shedding their skin."
Change Management - Communication - Strategic Planning
***********************************************************************************
Here's to staying in balance!
Fran Watson
3119 Stone Road
Douglas
Ontario K0J 1S0
Canada
Lenny's Tip For The Day: Don't replace the garage door!
For weeks, every time Lenny and Kathy would back the car out of the garage to leave the house, the remote-controlled garage door would shake, hit a certain point, then bounce back open again. After multiple attempts to close the door (hitting the remote control at just the right time, getting out of the car and pulling down the door by hand, or the ultimate - performing the complex, "Please, please close now" ritual) somehow, it would eventually shut.
One day, after 10 frustrating tries to close the door, Kathy resorted to calling a repair shop and asking them to come look at the door. The next day a technician arrived. After assessing the situation he said, "Ma'am, you need a new garage door. This one is old, worn out, and coming off the tracks."
Given his recommendation, and her own level of aggravation, Kathy felt she had no other choice than to replace the door.
Later that same day, Kathy's next-door neighbor came for a visit and Kathy mentioned the broken garage door. The neighbor asked to take a look and after he did he said, "Kathy, you don't need a new door. The door is just out of balance. It just needs something to stabilize it." He returned a few minutes later with a metal bar and attached it to the top of the door. It was like magic. The door opened and closed with ease!
Lenny has observed humans and has noticed that they sometimes allow their lives to get out of balance, without even realizing that a lack of balance is the source of their problems. Sometimes balance shifts through overuse, lack of maintenance, or inattention and that makes people begin to get off track. Often times, just making a small life adjustment will help stabilize us, get us functioning and working again with ease!
Lenny's Challenge: Take 60 seconds and ask yourself, "Am I out of balance? Working to hard? Not spending enough time with my family and loved ones? Not taking enough time for myself? What is one thing I can do today to make an adjustment that will help stabilize my life and bring it back on track and into balance?" Before you decide to "buy a new door," how can you learn to recognize your own state of balance?
Staying balanced is 100% your choice! Shed or You're Dead (TM)!
***************************************************************************************************************************************************************
Announcing NEW BRIDGES program!
Kathy Dempsey has partnered with Bob Danzig, former CEO of Hearst Newspapers, to bring you a new spirit-driven leadership program called Bridges - Connecting the spirit, commitment, and morale of your colleagues to your organization's noble purpose. Visit www.TheLearningAgenda.com for more information.
Order Kathy's new book, Shed or You're Dead (TM): 31 unConventional Strategies for Growth and Change (recipient of a Writer's Digest International Book Award). It makes a great gift for family, friends, colleagues, or staff! Do you know someone who needs a few strategies to get unstuck and grow? To order personalized and autographed copies, visit www.TheLearningAgenda.com or call 302-765-3301. Shed or You're Dead (TM) is $15.95. Free shipping to the first 10 people who mention this message! Order five or more copies and get 30% off the cover price.
Does your organization need a little help shedding? Looking for a speaker or trainer for your next meeting? Need help in 2004 with strategic planning? Kathy and Lenny's facilitated programs might be just what you need. Email Info@TheLearningAgenda.com or visit www.TheLearningAgenda.com for more details.
Recommend 60 Seconds of Shedding to a friend by sending them to www.KeepShedding.com to sign up for their own subscription.
Kathy B Dempsey - www.TheLearningAgenda.com - 302-765-3301 - Kathy@TheLearningAgenda.com
TheLearningAgenda.com - Helping individuals and organizations grow by "shedding their skin."
Change Management - Communication - Strategic Planning
***********************************************************************************
Here's to staying in balance!
Fran Watson
3119 Stone Road
Douglas
Ontario K0J 1S0
Canada
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Transforming Leaders
TRANSFORMING LEADERS
By Ken Keis
Leadership is missing in our political system, businesses, schools, and even our families. Our streets are filled with wandering souls waiting for someone to build a vision they can grasp.
Everyone is a leader at some level with someone. Leadership skills are required for parenting and being a friend or part of a couple—in your household and at work. We have all seen examples of ineffective leaders, from the lazy boss who expects everyone else to do his work, to the parent of the uncontrolled child at the mall. Leadership is not restricted to the manager of a major corporation; it applies to everyone in every organization.
The challenges for many leaders are that they can manage but not lead; quantify yet not empathize; control but not empower.
Leadership is learned; it is not a skill we receive at birth. To expect someone to automatically know how to build and lead anorganization is a fallacy at best.
We must approach the subject of leadership with a fresh, new vibrant attitude where we truly believe each person makes a difference and is a leader in his or her own right. This new way of thinking forces us to consider changes―where collaboration comes before confrontation, empowerment replaces control, and the value of the individual precedes profits or self-centered hidden agendas.
Leadership credibility comes from four qualities: inspiration, honesty, competency, and forward-looking. Effective leaders operate daily according to certain principles for positive change and demonstrate skills that others want to model.
Five skill sets are essential in the development of transforming leaders. Our experience has proven that few people are competent in all five skills. Educational programs can be created to help individuals learn these important skills.
Self-Management SkillsThis intensely personal yet important area includes the clarification of beliefs, values, purpose, and goals. If leaders are not clear about where they are going and what they stand for, few people will be willing to follow them. Only from a position of self-awareness will you be in a better position to devise a plan to develop and strengthen your weaker areas.
Interpersonal Communication Skills
Interpersonal communication skills are the vehicles through which all interactions you have with other people are made more clear and effective. Attending, listening, responding, and questioning are just four of the twelve skills identified as necessary for quality communication to occur.
Problem Management and Counseling SkillsLeaders who develop these competencies are able to encourage others to develop and perform to their potential. At the heart of effective coaching and mentoring, these proficiencies are critical to any organizational development. Advanced empathy, problem-ownership, action planning, confrontation, and self-sharing are just five of the twelve skills needed for competency in the areas of problem-management and counseling.
Consulting Skills
Group facilitation, clarification, assessment, evaluation, and reporting are included in this skill set. The emphasis of this section is your ability to handle complex situations with an increasingly in-depth set of responses.
Advanced Versatility and Style-Shifting SkillsThe ability to style-shift into appropriate behaviors that match the style of others is a necessity when building and empowering teams. This skill is for everyone; it can be applied to customer service, supervision, team building, and even spousal/family relationships. This expertise is required for gaining credibility with others and for adapting to the permanent state of change in which we find ourselves.
One way to identify your clients’ leadership strengths and weaknesses is through the Leadership Skills Inventory (LSI). The base of the LSI is Transformational Leadership, the belief that leaders can be made, with the right training and guidance. Today's tough organizational challenges require transformational leaders who can adapt to rapidly changing social and technical environments. The Leadership Skills Inventory provides participants with the necessary feedback to better understand and develop their own transformational leadership skills.
Dr. Doug Perkins, Director of People for Coastal Pacific Xpress (CPX), has taken a number of his company’s senior staff through the Leadership Skills Inventory. CPX, headquartered in Cloverdale, BC, has evolved from one truck and trailer in 1985 to 160 trucks and 250 trailers today, making it one of the fastest-growing, temperature-controlled truckload carriers in the province. In fact, the company serves major markets throughout North America.
“Trucking often attracts lower-skilled people,” states company owner Jim Mickey. “Factors combine to create what I call a ‘stupid business.’ You have a $160,000 truck, you put on a trailer worth $70,000 holding $50,000 of cargo and you trust a guy with no competence. How dumb is this?”
To tackle the problem, Jim and CPX set out to hand-pick the best in the industry. Enter Dr. Doug Perkins and CRG assessments.
Doug gives the Leadership Skills Inventory–Self to all CPX managers to evaluate their own leadership skills. To create a full picture of each manager’s strengths, each manager gives Doug the names of five employees who know them well. Doug then distributes the Leadership Skills Inventory–Others to those individuals. To protect people’s anonymity, those who complete the LSI–Others tools return them to Doug, not the manager.
After Doug has received the five LSI–Others for each manager, he averages all five scores and compares them against the manager’s scores on the Leadership Skills Inventory–Self. He then gives the results to the respective manager for review.
Doug and the manager work through the three highest and the three lowest scores in each category. Where the manager received scores that showed he or she was highly competent in that area and capable of teaching that skill, for example, Doug asks the manager to teach his or her assistant how to train the staff in that particular area. Where the manager scored low and wants to improve, Doug teaches or provides resources to help the manager in those areas.
Doug sees the Leadership Skills Inventory as a helpful coaching tool to complement the other CRG resources Coastal Pacific Xpress is using.
Becoming a transforming leader is not an overnight process. You may find it overwhelming and extensive at times, but it will be worth it. You will discover you can make a difference, whoever you are.
Ken Keis is the president and CEO of Consulting Resource Group in Abbotsford, B.C. (www.crgleader.com). He can be reached at (604) 852-0566 or ken@crgleader.com.
By Ken Keis
Leadership is missing in our political system, businesses, schools, and even our families. Our streets are filled with wandering souls waiting for someone to build a vision they can grasp.
Everyone is a leader at some level with someone. Leadership skills are required for parenting and being a friend or part of a couple—in your household and at work. We have all seen examples of ineffective leaders, from the lazy boss who expects everyone else to do his work, to the parent of the uncontrolled child at the mall. Leadership is not restricted to the manager of a major corporation; it applies to everyone in every organization.
The challenges for many leaders are that they can manage but not lead; quantify yet not empathize; control but not empower.
Leadership is learned; it is not a skill we receive at birth. To expect someone to automatically know how to build and lead anorganization is a fallacy at best.
We must approach the subject of leadership with a fresh, new vibrant attitude where we truly believe each person makes a difference and is a leader in his or her own right. This new way of thinking forces us to consider changes―where collaboration comes before confrontation, empowerment replaces control, and the value of the individual precedes profits or self-centered hidden agendas.
Leadership credibility comes from four qualities: inspiration, honesty, competency, and forward-looking. Effective leaders operate daily according to certain principles for positive change and demonstrate skills that others want to model.
Five skill sets are essential in the development of transforming leaders. Our experience has proven that few people are competent in all five skills. Educational programs can be created to help individuals learn these important skills.
Self-Management SkillsThis intensely personal yet important area includes the clarification of beliefs, values, purpose, and goals. If leaders are not clear about where they are going and what they stand for, few people will be willing to follow them. Only from a position of self-awareness will you be in a better position to devise a plan to develop and strengthen your weaker areas.
Interpersonal Communication Skills
Interpersonal communication skills are the vehicles through which all interactions you have with other people are made more clear and effective. Attending, listening, responding, and questioning are just four of the twelve skills identified as necessary for quality communication to occur.
Problem Management and Counseling SkillsLeaders who develop these competencies are able to encourage others to develop and perform to their potential. At the heart of effective coaching and mentoring, these proficiencies are critical to any organizational development. Advanced empathy, problem-ownership, action planning, confrontation, and self-sharing are just five of the twelve skills needed for competency in the areas of problem-management and counseling.
Consulting Skills
Group facilitation, clarification, assessment, evaluation, and reporting are included in this skill set. The emphasis of this section is your ability to handle complex situations with an increasingly in-depth set of responses.
Advanced Versatility and Style-Shifting SkillsThe ability to style-shift into appropriate behaviors that match the style of others is a necessity when building and empowering teams. This skill is for everyone; it can be applied to customer service, supervision, team building, and even spousal/family relationships. This expertise is required for gaining credibility with others and for adapting to the permanent state of change in which we find ourselves.
One way to identify your clients’ leadership strengths and weaknesses is through the Leadership Skills Inventory (LSI). The base of the LSI is Transformational Leadership, the belief that leaders can be made, with the right training and guidance. Today's tough organizational challenges require transformational leaders who can adapt to rapidly changing social and technical environments. The Leadership Skills Inventory provides participants with the necessary feedback to better understand and develop their own transformational leadership skills.
Dr. Doug Perkins, Director of People for Coastal Pacific Xpress (CPX), has taken a number of his company’s senior staff through the Leadership Skills Inventory. CPX, headquartered in Cloverdale, BC, has evolved from one truck and trailer in 1985 to 160 trucks and 250 trailers today, making it one of the fastest-growing, temperature-controlled truckload carriers in the province. In fact, the company serves major markets throughout North America.
“Trucking often attracts lower-skilled people,” states company owner Jim Mickey. “Factors combine to create what I call a ‘stupid business.’ You have a $160,000 truck, you put on a trailer worth $70,000 holding $50,000 of cargo and you trust a guy with no competence. How dumb is this?”
To tackle the problem, Jim and CPX set out to hand-pick the best in the industry. Enter Dr. Doug Perkins and CRG assessments.
Doug gives the Leadership Skills Inventory–Self to all CPX managers to evaluate their own leadership skills. To create a full picture of each manager’s strengths, each manager gives Doug the names of five employees who know them well. Doug then distributes the Leadership Skills Inventory–Others to those individuals. To protect people’s anonymity, those who complete the LSI–Others tools return them to Doug, not the manager.
After Doug has received the five LSI–Others for each manager, he averages all five scores and compares them against the manager’s scores on the Leadership Skills Inventory–Self. He then gives the results to the respective manager for review.
Doug and the manager work through the three highest and the three lowest scores in each category. Where the manager received scores that showed he or she was highly competent in that area and capable of teaching that skill, for example, Doug asks the manager to teach his or her assistant how to train the staff in that particular area. Where the manager scored low and wants to improve, Doug teaches or provides resources to help the manager in those areas.
Doug sees the Leadership Skills Inventory as a helpful coaching tool to complement the other CRG resources Coastal Pacific Xpress is using.
Becoming a transforming leader is not an overnight process. You may find it overwhelming and extensive at times, but it will be worth it. You will discover you can make a difference, whoever you are.
Ken Keis is the president and CEO of Consulting Resource Group in Abbotsford, B.C. (www.crgleader.com). He can be reached at (604) 852-0566 or ken@crgleader.com.
Monday, June 2, 2008
My Purpose
I have been online for aout 10 years now. I have experimented with online marketing, downloaded ebooks that promise me I will make loads of money if only I..., maxed out my credit cards to pay for this information, spent hours and hours downloading and reviewing "free" information from the many givewaways I participated in. I have felt guilty about the amount of time I have spent doing this, the time I have spent reading and sorting the many emails I have received, trying to decide what to keep and what to trash, who is offering what this week, how can I make some money from this.
I read something this week that really struck home with me. Funnily enough it was a book about MLM Marketing, but with a difference. One thing the author said was that you should never promote a product you haven't tried. If you don't know how it works, how can you tell anyone else about its benefits. I'm sure you, like me, have received multiple emails with the same heading and the same wording - affiliates who are promoting a product they know nothing about. I too have been guilty.
The other thing the author talked about was building relationships. That took me back to the reason I wanted to get involved online, to build relationships with people, to share the knowledge and skill that I had gained to help them in their daily lives. I had even taken a coaching course to allow me to do this and yet I wasted all this time running from one program to another, one traffic exchange to another, only to become exhausted and return to my real passion.
Now is the time to go back to the beginning. To get out the CD's that Mike provided me and listen to them again. To withdraw from the Traffic Exchanges until I have developed my focus and then target simply those that will support my goals. To develop my website with focus on providing the type of information that I know.
I have been a career counsellor for 20 years and have done training for most of those years. I joined Toastmasters in 2002 and so I have skills and experience in that area as well. I have taken coaching courses, learned about personalities with Myers Briggs and Personality Dimensions (True Colors)and completed a University Degree in Social Development Studies. All of these abilities and interests involve people and yet I am spending more and more of my time not helping people, but insread reading email that I don't need to read and surfing on traffic exchanges to build credits for my webpages.
It is definitely time to refocus and get back to the basics.
I invite you to comment and check back to see how I'm doing. If you have any advice for me, if you've gone through this yourself, I'd sure like to hear from you.
Fran
I read something this week that really struck home with me. Funnily enough it was a book about MLM Marketing, but with a difference. One thing the author said was that you should never promote a product you haven't tried. If you don't know how it works, how can you tell anyone else about its benefits. I'm sure you, like me, have received multiple emails with the same heading and the same wording - affiliates who are promoting a product they know nothing about. I too have been guilty.
The other thing the author talked about was building relationships. That took me back to the reason I wanted to get involved online, to build relationships with people, to share the knowledge and skill that I had gained to help them in their daily lives. I had even taken a coaching course to allow me to do this and yet I wasted all this time running from one program to another, one traffic exchange to another, only to become exhausted and return to my real passion.
Now is the time to go back to the beginning. To get out the CD's that Mike provided me and listen to them again. To withdraw from the Traffic Exchanges until I have developed my focus and then target simply those that will support my goals. To develop my website with focus on providing the type of information that I know.
I have been a career counsellor for 20 years and have done training for most of those years. I joined Toastmasters in 2002 and so I have skills and experience in that area as well. I have taken coaching courses, learned about personalities with Myers Briggs and Personality Dimensions (True Colors)and completed a University Degree in Social Development Studies. All of these abilities and interests involve people and yet I am spending more and more of my time not helping people, but insread reading email that I don't need to read and surfing on traffic exchanges to build credits for my webpages.
It is definitely time to refocus and get back to the basics.
I invite you to comment and check back to see how I'm doing. If you have any advice for me, if you've gone through this yourself, I'd sure like to hear from you.
Fran
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Vision and Value
"The vision and values we choose to fix in our minds today determines tomorrow's character and culture. We start to change who we're becoming and where we're headed when we change what we value and picture in our future."
- from Jim Clemmer's article, "Our Values Shape Our Character and Culture"
- from Jim Clemmer's article, "Our Values Shape Our Character and Culture"
What Are Your Priorities?
"Our values hierarchy sets our priorities. It determines where we spend our time. For example, do we choose to watch TV or invest that time in personal improvement? Do we sleep longer or go jogging? Do we spend time with our family or take on that extra project with heavy out of town travel? Who gets invited to important meetings? These are important questions because we invest our time in those areas we value most."
- from Jim Clemmer's article, "Our Values Set Our Priorities"
- from Jim Clemmer's article, "Our Values Set Our Priorities"
How Do You See The World?
"There is no objective reality. We don't see the world as it is, we see the world as we are."
Sean was filling out a university questionnaire to help determine roommate compatibility. Beside the questions, "Do you make your bed every day?" and "Do you consider yourself a neat person?" he checked "Yes." Later his mother reviewed the questionnaire. Knowing those answers were far from the truth, she asked Sean why he'd lied. "What do you expect me to do," he retorted. "I don't want to get stuck living with some slob!"
The gap between what we say we value and how we live can get pretty big. This hypocrisy could be because I am trying to fool others. Some people don't try to do what's right, they try to guess what other people think is right. For example, when someone says it's not about the money, but the principle of the thing, it's usually about the money. The manager of a large bookstore once told me that the book they have stolen the most is the Bible. Hypocrites climb the social, organizational, or career ladder 'wrong' by 'wrong' while trying to justify, excuse, or disguise their behavior. Like Mae West in Klondike Annie, when choosing between two evils, they pick the one they haven't tried before.
More often hypocrisy is because I am fooling myself. I am not being true to me. I am not authentic. Lack of authenticity often stems from lack of awareness of the values or beliefs that are really at the core of who I am. When we're not centered with a solid core, change is often a threat. It's also harder to accumulate the positive choices that vaccinate us against the Victimitis Virus and keep us from living in Pity City. Lacking a firm focal point, passion is weak and commitment is soft. Without a strong set of core values we're more likely to lead our lives from the outside in rather than the inside out. A centered leader grows his or her inner space and provides spirit and meaning to others. When our values aren't in focus our energy is easily scattered. That makes it tougher to mobilize ourselves never mind anyone else. Core values provide a context for continuous growth and development that takes us toward our dreams. Our core values project forward to become our vision. How we see the world is what we project from ourselves.
In Going Deep, Ian Percy writes, "Most business people I know are much more concerned with the quality of their customer service than they are with the quality of their parenting and spousing." In one highly successful company we consulted with executives proudly declared they had the highest divorce rate of any major corporation in the country. Many wore their divorces as a badge of honor to show their commitment to the company. When the company suddenly tosses them aside or they reach retirement, is a broken family the price that most of these executives will feel glad they paid for their career success? No one can judge someone else's values, but is that really what they value? Is career success at all costs their core essence?
Our core values show themselves in many ways. One is at points of crisis, disaster, or adversity. That's often when our actions move us unconsciously from the depth of our heart. Any masks we may be wearing are torn off to reveal our true face. Money is often another powerful way a person's core essence is revealed to him or herself and/or others. It's amazing to hear some people proclaim family values and then trash their "loved ones" over an inheritance. Greed is responsible for some mighty creative rationalizations. It's great to have money and the good life that money can buy. But we need to ensure that we haven't lost the invaluable things that money can't buy.
Excerpted from Jim's fourth international best-seller, Growing the Distance: Timeless Principles for Personal, Career, and Family Success. Jim Clemmer’s practical leadership books, keynote presentations, workshops, and team retreats have helped hundreds of thousands of people worldwide improve personal, team, and organizational leadership. Visit his web site, www.clemmer.net, for a huge selection of free practical resources including nearly 300 articles, dozens of video clips, team assessments, leadership newsletter, Improvement Points service, and popular leadership blog.
Sean was filling out a university questionnaire to help determine roommate compatibility. Beside the questions, "Do you make your bed every day?" and "Do you consider yourself a neat person?" he checked "Yes." Later his mother reviewed the questionnaire. Knowing those answers were far from the truth, she asked Sean why he'd lied. "What do you expect me to do," he retorted. "I don't want to get stuck living with some slob!"
The gap between what we say we value and how we live can get pretty big. This hypocrisy could be because I am trying to fool others. Some people don't try to do what's right, they try to guess what other people think is right. For example, when someone says it's not about the money, but the principle of the thing, it's usually about the money. The manager of a large bookstore once told me that the book they have stolen the most is the Bible. Hypocrites climb the social, organizational, or career ladder 'wrong' by 'wrong' while trying to justify, excuse, or disguise their behavior. Like Mae West in Klondike Annie, when choosing between two evils, they pick the one they haven't tried before.
More often hypocrisy is because I am fooling myself. I am not being true to me. I am not authentic. Lack of authenticity often stems from lack of awareness of the values or beliefs that are really at the core of who I am. When we're not centered with a solid core, change is often a threat. It's also harder to accumulate the positive choices that vaccinate us against the Victimitis Virus and keep us from living in Pity City. Lacking a firm focal point, passion is weak and commitment is soft. Without a strong set of core values we're more likely to lead our lives from the outside in rather than the inside out. A centered leader grows his or her inner space and provides spirit and meaning to others. When our values aren't in focus our energy is easily scattered. That makes it tougher to mobilize ourselves never mind anyone else. Core values provide a context for continuous growth and development that takes us toward our dreams. Our core values project forward to become our vision. How we see the world is what we project from ourselves.
In Going Deep, Ian Percy writes, "Most business people I know are much more concerned with the quality of their customer service than they are with the quality of their parenting and spousing." In one highly successful company we consulted with executives proudly declared they had the highest divorce rate of any major corporation in the country. Many wore their divorces as a badge of honor to show their commitment to the company. When the company suddenly tosses them aside or they reach retirement, is a broken family the price that most of these executives will feel glad they paid for their career success? No one can judge someone else's values, but is that really what they value? Is career success at all costs their core essence?
Our core values show themselves in many ways. One is at points of crisis, disaster, or adversity. That's often when our actions move us unconsciously from the depth of our heart. Any masks we may be wearing are torn off to reveal our true face. Money is often another powerful way a person's core essence is revealed to him or herself and/or others. It's amazing to hear some people proclaim family values and then trash their "loved ones" over an inheritance. Greed is responsible for some mighty creative rationalizations. It's great to have money and the good life that money can buy. But we need to ensure that we haven't lost the invaluable things that money can't buy.
Excerpted from Jim's fourth international best-seller, Growing the Distance: Timeless Principles for Personal, Career, and Family Success. Jim Clemmer’s practical leadership books, keynote presentations, workshops, and team retreats have helped hundreds of thousands of people worldwide improve personal, team, and organizational leadership. Visit his web site, www.clemmer.net, for a huge selection of free practical resources including nearly 300 articles, dozens of video clips, team assessments, leadership newsletter, Improvement Points service, and popular leadership blog.
Monday, March 3, 2008
Change For The Better
"Change for the Better"
By Edel Jarboe
(Click here to read this article online:
http://www.selfhelpforher.com/newsletter154.htm)
The key to changing your life for the better lies in your
willingness to change. It lies in your willingness to let go of
past failures, mistakes, and fears and to embrace your future.
Letting go of self-limiting beliefs and behavior, however, is
difficult because we are often not even aware that we are the
ones holding ourselves back from our happiness. Instead, we
blame our circumstances and other people. But if you are
committed to making your life work you have to be honest with
yourself starting right now. You have to examine the reasons why
you seem to find yourself stuck in a life rut and you have to be
brave and take positive steps to change your life for the better.
== Change Your Habits, Change Your Life ==
The first step is to let go of old habits, beliefs, and routines
that keep you feeling trapped in your life. In other words, pack
up what isn't working for you anymore-emotionally, physically,
financially, etc-- and make room for new dreams and challenges.
Pack up your fears, failures, and disappointments as well because
these are what keep us feeling as if we have no control over our
happiness. And in order to free yourself to reach for your
dreams with confidence you have to break free of your fears and
self-imposed limitations.
In other words, you must challenge your inner obstacles by doing
what you fear. Stop being so hard on yourself and adopt the
attitude that you are in this for the long haul and learn to take
setbacks in stride. Instead of beating yourself up, give
yourself points for having the courage to try and for having the
courage to be true to yourself. Then get back up and try again.
Don't give up on yourself or your happiness just because you
didn't succeed on your first, second, or third try. Keep
believing in yourself and in your dreams and keep on until you
reach your goals.
== Change From Within ==
Too often we stubbornly cling to what isn't working in the hopes
that things will change on their own. But realistically the only
thing that you can change is you. You can change your
perspective on a situation by changing your beliefs and
attitudes. You can change how you choose to deal with the
situation. And, most importantly, you can change how you look at
yourself and your happiness. You can choose to believe that you
deserve to be happy and that you are capable of making your
happiness a reality.
On the other hand, clinging to rigid ideas of what life is
supposed to be like, to what is supposed to make you happy is how
you set yourself up for disappointment and end up in a life rut.
Be willing to let what is going to happen, happen. In order to
make a positive change in your life you have to change your
attitude. Happiness doesn't always come in the package we either
want or expect it to. Instead of wishing that things were
different, better, or easier practice acceptance and consciously
make the most of the tools and resources that are available to
you right now. Sometimes "you" have to make things work out the
way you want them to.
== Dig Out of A Mental Rut ==
Stop using past failures and disappointments as a predictor of
future success. This is a big happiness trap because we give up
before we have even begun to dream. Nurture a belief in yourself
and in your ability to create your own happiness. The way things
are is not the way things have to be.
Again, when we get rid of self-limiting beliefs and self
defeating behavior we make room for personal empowerment and
success. So don't be afraid to embrace new challenges and
opportunities in order to make your dreams a reality. You are
what you think and what you believe about yourself. It is
therefore up to you to take responsibility for your life in the
present moment and to stop making excuses for your unhappiness.
It is up to you to change your life for the better.
------------------------------------------------------------
QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF------------------------------------------------------------
1. What past failures or disappointments are you hiding behind?
What can you do to get out of this mental rut? What needs to
happen in order for you to learn and grow from this experience
instead of using it as an excuse?
2. How are you holding yourself back from your happiness? Which
habits and beliefs are keeping you stuck? Which habits and
beliefs do you need to replace them with?
3. Are you shying away from new opportunities and challenges?
What fear are you afraid to face and why? What would happen in
your life if you were to confront and conquer this fear? How
would your perception of yourself change? How would your life
change?
------------------------------------------------------------
MONTHLY ADVICE
------------------------------------------------------------
"My ex-boyfriend (of 7 months) and I broke-up about 5 months
ago... Is there any hope to reconcile with him?"
To read the response, click here:
http://www.selfhelpforher.com/question95.htm
AOL Users
click here.
------------------------------------------------------------
HELP US GROW
------------------------------------------------------------
Back issues archived at http://www.selfhelpforher.com/sln.htm
Subscribe:
mailto:subscribe@selfhelpforher.com?subject=Subscribe
By Edel Jarboe
(Click here to read this article online:
http://www.selfhelpforher.com/newsletter154.htm)
The key to changing your life for the better lies in your
willingness to change. It lies in your willingness to let go of
past failures, mistakes, and fears and to embrace your future.
Letting go of self-limiting beliefs and behavior, however, is
difficult because we are often not even aware that we are the
ones holding ourselves back from our happiness. Instead, we
blame our circumstances and other people. But if you are
committed to making your life work you have to be honest with
yourself starting right now. You have to examine the reasons why
you seem to find yourself stuck in a life rut and you have to be
brave and take positive steps to change your life for the better.
== Change Your Habits, Change Your Life ==
The first step is to let go of old habits, beliefs, and routines
that keep you feeling trapped in your life. In other words, pack
up what isn't working for you anymore-emotionally, physically,
financially, etc-- and make room for new dreams and challenges.
Pack up your fears, failures, and disappointments as well because
these are what keep us feeling as if we have no control over our
happiness. And in order to free yourself to reach for your
dreams with confidence you have to break free of your fears and
self-imposed limitations.
In other words, you must challenge your inner obstacles by doing
what you fear. Stop being so hard on yourself and adopt the
attitude that you are in this for the long haul and learn to take
setbacks in stride. Instead of beating yourself up, give
yourself points for having the courage to try and for having the
courage to be true to yourself. Then get back up and try again.
Don't give up on yourself or your happiness just because you
didn't succeed on your first, second, or third try. Keep
believing in yourself and in your dreams and keep on until you
reach your goals.
== Change From Within ==
Too often we stubbornly cling to what isn't working in the hopes
that things will change on their own. But realistically the only
thing that you can change is you. You can change your
perspective on a situation by changing your beliefs and
attitudes. You can change how you choose to deal with the
situation. And, most importantly, you can change how you look at
yourself and your happiness. You can choose to believe that you
deserve to be happy and that you are capable of making your
happiness a reality.
On the other hand, clinging to rigid ideas of what life is
supposed to be like, to what is supposed to make you happy is how
you set yourself up for disappointment and end up in a life rut.
Be willing to let what is going to happen, happen. In order to
make a positive change in your life you have to change your
attitude. Happiness doesn't always come in the package we either
want or expect it to. Instead of wishing that things were
different, better, or easier practice acceptance and consciously
make the most of the tools and resources that are available to
you right now. Sometimes "you" have to make things work out the
way you want them to.
== Dig Out of A Mental Rut ==
Stop using past failures and disappointments as a predictor of
future success. This is a big happiness trap because we give up
before we have even begun to dream. Nurture a belief in yourself
and in your ability to create your own happiness. The way things
are is not the way things have to be.
Again, when we get rid of self-limiting beliefs and self
defeating behavior we make room for personal empowerment and
success. So don't be afraid to embrace new challenges and
opportunities in order to make your dreams a reality. You are
what you think and what you believe about yourself. It is
therefore up to you to take responsibility for your life in the
present moment and to stop making excuses for your unhappiness.
It is up to you to change your life for the better.
------------------------------------------------------------
QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF------------------------------------------------------------
1. What past failures or disappointments are you hiding behind?
What can you do to get out of this mental rut? What needs to
happen in order for you to learn and grow from this experience
instead of using it as an excuse?
2. How are you holding yourself back from your happiness? Which
habits and beliefs are keeping you stuck? Which habits and
beliefs do you need to replace them with?
3. Are you shying away from new opportunities and challenges?
What fear are you afraid to face and why? What would happen in
your life if you were to confront and conquer this fear? How
would your perception of yourself change? How would your life
change?
------------------------------------------------------------
MONTHLY ADVICE
------------------------------------------------------------
"My ex-boyfriend (of 7 months) and I broke-up about 5 months
ago... Is there any hope to reconcile with him?"
To read the response, click here:
http://www.selfhelpforher.com/question95.htm
AOL Users
click here.
------------------------------------------------------------
HELP US GROW
------------------------------------------------------------
Back issues archived at http://www.selfhelpforher.com/sln.htm
Subscribe:
mailto:subscribe@selfhelpforher.com?subject=Subscribe
Attitude
A great attitude does much more than turn on the lights in our
worlds; it seems to magically connect us to all sorts of
serendipitous opportunities that were somehow absent before the
change.
- Earl Nightingale
******************************************************************************
"Wherever You Go"
By Edel Jarboe
(Click here to read this article online:
http://www.selfhelpforher.com/newsletter150.htm)
If only things were new and different. If only you had a new
house, a new job, or a new body, then you would be happy. But be
careful of this kind of thinking. Happiness is not a one-time
deal.
I call this "if only" fantasy. "If only everything were perfect,
then I would be happy." But is this really true? Trite as it may
sound, wherever you go, there you are. You will still be the same
person but only in a different set of circumstances. The
situation may change but if you are still the same person with
the same fears, insecurities, and limiting beliefs then any
change you make is going to be temporary. You have to change from
within in order for there to be real and lasting change in your
life.
Get Real With Yourself
Will wearing a size 8 make the rest of your life better too? Will
you get that promotion and the corner office because you look
good in your clothes? Do you believe that you can only attract
someone if you are the right size? Will you really get married
just because you are slimmer? Don't set yourself up for
disappointment. Realize that these things will happen if you work
on making your dreams come true no matter what your circumstances
are. Clothing size has nothing to do with it. Rather, it is your
level of self-confidence and your willingness to commit to your
goals that determines your success. Let go of the "if only"
fantasy and accept that you will have to work at making the rest
of your life all that you want it to be even after you have
achieved your dream.
On the other hand, are you punishing someone in your life for
another person's bad behavior? (Your last boyfriend cheated on
you so you are suspicious of your current flame.) That is, are
you so determined not to repeat the past that you aren't giving
your present a chance? Or are you ignoring what your instincts
are telling you because you want so very much for things to work
out this time? Let go of past failures and disappointments and
work on your happiness in the here and now. Accept that things
didn't work out a certain way for a reason and that all the "if
only's" in the world aren't going to change the past.
Uncover the Root of Your Unhappiness
Don't be afraid to dig down deep in order to discover what is
keeping you from your happiness. It may not be circumstances
after all that are making you unhappy but rather your attitude
and beliefs. What do you believe about yourself and your
happiness and how is this keeping you from realizing your dreams?
For example, if you believe that you are shy and unable to make
friends then is it any wonder that you find yourself alone? As
long as you believe this to be your truth, then you will act
accordingly. At social gatherings you will probably give off
awkward vibes and hunch miserably in the corner. At work, you
will avoid opportunities to get to know your co-workers. And you
will most likely not make small talk while waiting in line at the
grocery store.
How do you combat this crippling belief? Start small. For example
practice small talk by using common conversation openers, such as
asking how someone is doing, talking about the weather, or
discussing a mutual interest. Get comfortable one on one with
people, and then work your way up to feeling comfortable in small
groups of 3-5 people. Set a goal of talking to at least one new
person a day even if it is just for moment and you will be amazed
at how your confidence will grow.
Face Your Fears
What are you running from, and to, and why? If you are serious
about changing your life for the better, find out the answer to
these questions before you make any changes in your life. What
are you running from? Is it past failures or past feelings of
inadequacy? What is going to make your life better in the long
term and why? And most importantly, what are you realistically
going to do to make your life better?
In short, stop running from your problems and face them head on.
Face your fears because the Universe tends to keep presenting you
with the same soul task until you get it right. What lesson do
you need to learn and how will it improve the quality of your
life? Instead of wishing things were better, instead of waiting
for happiness to randomly plop itself in your lap, take the
initiative. Make a commitment to solve a specific problem in your
life that is causing you the greatest stress and unhappiness.
Free yourself from this burden so that you can take better
control of the rest of your life too.
Start Now
Instead of waiting for the perfect circumstances, begin to work
on your happiness from where you are right now. Because to be
quite honest, you could spend the rest of your life waiting for
everything to fall into place, until you felt safe enough to
reach for your happiness, or to even allow yourself to be happy.
Starting over with your happiness takes courage, however. You
have to commit to changing your attitude, beliefs, and behavior.
You have to commit to thinking like a winner.
Realize that whatever it is that you wish would change your life
is only the beginning. You have to take the next steps towards
creating the life that you want. In other words, losing weight,
landing a new job, or buying a new house is just one thing that
could make you happy. You have to keep working on making your
whole life all that you want it to be. This means being honest
with yourself about what makes you happy and the reasons why you
are unhappy. This means facing up to the reality that no one
thing is going to make you happy forever. But this is what makes
life so wonderful. There are plenty of opportunities for
happiness if you are willing to reach for them again and again.
------------------------------------------------------------
QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF------------------------------------------------------------
1. What is your "if only" fantasy and how can you make it come
true? That is, how can you take greater control of your
happiness? Most importantly, how will this change your life for
the better and are you willing to work for it?
2. What has kept you from being happy in the past? Was it your
attitude or circumstances? Whether you chose attitude or
circumstance, how can you maintain a more positive outlook in the
future?
3. What problem in your life are you running from and how will
facing it improve your life? How will you deal with this problem
once and for all?
------------------------------------------------------------
HELP US GROW
------------------------------------------------------------
Back issues archived at http://www.selfhelpforher.com/sln.htm
Subscribe:
mailto:subscribe@selfhelpforher.com?subject=Subscribe
worlds; it seems to magically connect us to all sorts of
serendipitous opportunities that were somehow absent before the
change.
- Earl Nightingale
******************************************************************************
"Wherever You Go"
By Edel Jarboe
(Click here to read this article online:
http://www.selfhelpforher.com/newsletter150.htm)
If only things were new and different. If only you had a new
house, a new job, or a new body, then you would be happy. But be
careful of this kind of thinking. Happiness is not a one-time
deal.
I call this "if only" fantasy. "If only everything were perfect,
then I would be happy." But is this really true? Trite as it may
sound, wherever you go, there you are. You will still be the same
person but only in a different set of circumstances. The
situation may change but if you are still the same person with
the same fears, insecurities, and limiting beliefs then any
change you make is going to be temporary. You have to change from
within in order for there to be real and lasting change in your
life.
Get Real With Yourself
Will wearing a size 8 make the rest of your life better too? Will
you get that promotion and the corner office because you look
good in your clothes? Do you believe that you can only attract
someone if you are the right size? Will you really get married
just because you are slimmer? Don't set yourself up for
disappointment. Realize that these things will happen if you work
on making your dreams come true no matter what your circumstances
are. Clothing size has nothing to do with it. Rather, it is your
level of self-confidence and your willingness to commit to your
goals that determines your success. Let go of the "if only"
fantasy and accept that you will have to work at making the rest
of your life all that you want it to be even after you have
achieved your dream.
On the other hand, are you punishing someone in your life for
another person's bad behavior? (Your last boyfriend cheated on
you so you are suspicious of your current flame.) That is, are
you so determined not to repeat the past that you aren't giving
your present a chance? Or are you ignoring what your instincts
are telling you because you want so very much for things to work
out this time? Let go of past failures and disappointments and
work on your happiness in the here and now. Accept that things
didn't work out a certain way for a reason and that all the "if
only's" in the world aren't going to change the past.
Uncover the Root of Your Unhappiness
Don't be afraid to dig down deep in order to discover what is
keeping you from your happiness. It may not be circumstances
after all that are making you unhappy but rather your attitude
and beliefs. What do you believe about yourself and your
happiness and how is this keeping you from realizing your dreams?
For example, if you believe that you are shy and unable to make
friends then is it any wonder that you find yourself alone? As
long as you believe this to be your truth, then you will act
accordingly. At social gatherings you will probably give off
awkward vibes and hunch miserably in the corner. At work, you
will avoid opportunities to get to know your co-workers. And you
will most likely not make small talk while waiting in line at the
grocery store.
How do you combat this crippling belief? Start small. For example
practice small talk by using common conversation openers, such as
asking how someone is doing, talking about the weather, or
discussing a mutual interest. Get comfortable one on one with
people, and then work your way up to feeling comfortable in small
groups of 3-5 people. Set a goal of talking to at least one new
person a day even if it is just for moment and you will be amazed
at how your confidence will grow.
Face Your Fears
What are you running from, and to, and why? If you are serious
about changing your life for the better, find out the answer to
these questions before you make any changes in your life. What
are you running from? Is it past failures or past feelings of
inadequacy? What is going to make your life better in the long
term and why? And most importantly, what are you realistically
going to do to make your life better?
In short, stop running from your problems and face them head on.
Face your fears because the Universe tends to keep presenting you
with the same soul task until you get it right. What lesson do
you need to learn and how will it improve the quality of your
life? Instead of wishing things were better, instead of waiting
for happiness to randomly plop itself in your lap, take the
initiative. Make a commitment to solve a specific problem in your
life that is causing you the greatest stress and unhappiness.
Free yourself from this burden so that you can take better
control of the rest of your life too.
Start Now
Instead of waiting for the perfect circumstances, begin to work
on your happiness from where you are right now. Because to be
quite honest, you could spend the rest of your life waiting for
everything to fall into place, until you felt safe enough to
reach for your happiness, or to even allow yourself to be happy.
Starting over with your happiness takes courage, however. You
have to commit to changing your attitude, beliefs, and behavior.
You have to commit to thinking like a winner.
Realize that whatever it is that you wish would change your life
is only the beginning. You have to take the next steps towards
creating the life that you want. In other words, losing weight,
landing a new job, or buying a new house is just one thing that
could make you happy. You have to keep working on making your
whole life all that you want it to be. This means being honest
with yourself about what makes you happy and the reasons why you
are unhappy. This means facing up to the reality that no one
thing is going to make you happy forever. But this is what makes
life so wonderful. There are plenty of opportunities for
happiness if you are willing to reach for them again and again.
------------------------------------------------------------
QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF------------------------------------------------------------
1. What is your "if only" fantasy and how can you make it come
true? That is, how can you take greater control of your
happiness? Most importantly, how will this change your life for
the better and are you willing to work for it?
2. What has kept you from being happy in the past? Was it your
attitude or circumstances? Whether you chose attitude or
circumstance, how can you maintain a more positive outlook in the
future?
3. What problem in your life are you running from and how will
facing it improve your life? How will you deal with this problem
once and for all?
------------------------------------------------------------
HELP US GROW
------------------------------------------------------------
Back issues archived at http://www.selfhelpforher.com/sln.htm
Subscribe:
mailto:subscribe@selfhelpforher.com?subject=Subscribe
Benchmarks For Success
Welcome to this Bonus Lesson for the 'Keys to Success' e-Course.
For over 25 years, I've studied and read, watched and coached highly successful people, from self-made millionaires to professional golfers, to great ministers, parents and entrepreneurs. I've read over 2000 books in psychology, self-help, business, investing, management, leadership and success strategies. I've worked with Fortune 100 companies and I've watched sole proprietors both succeed and fail, and from all of that, I've tried to summarize the 6 Keys that I believe are the are critical, essential elements for long-term success in life.
You've read the Six Keys. You've had time to ponder them. I hope you've taken notes, and perhaps printed and re-read the lessons several times. I hope you've found some points you doubt or disagree with, or some items that in your specific situation might have to be modified to 'fit' just right. But I hope you've also seen the essential truth in each of the points. Let's re-cap them:
You will not achieve your dreams or be successful in life if you fail to take care of yourself. Insist on time for rest, time for fitness, time to review your goals, time to develop your plans and develop better strategies.
Beyond taking care of your body, mind and soul, you will need tools and equipment, skills and resources to achieve your dreams. You will need quiet in which to concentrate. You will need a 'problem free zone' where you can be productive, creative and effective. Highly successful people invest in a Personal Eco-System that lets them function at their best.
Dream big dreams, complete in every detail and rich in sensory cues. High achievers imagine the future exactly the way they want it, then develop plans and strategies to create the life they envision. Set goals. Develop plans. Write them down and review them daily. Once you have a goal and a strategy, pursue it with all your heart, mind, strength and energy. Use your imagination to create the life you want!
Ask better questions. Asking better, more powerful and more interesting questions will transform the quality of your life. Ask yourself, 'How can I?' Ask yourself, 'Who can teach me?' Ask yourself, 'What are my most important values, priorities and goals, and how can I reach them?' Focus on great questions and let the answers pull your forward.
Whatever you desire to achieve, start it today. Take some action in the direction you want to go. Then take another, and another. Action has power and decisiveness in it. Action gives us enthusiasm, builds our confidence and encourages us to go further. Success requires and is based on action. Do it.
Create a lifestyle based on repeated daily habits that reflect your values and your ideals. Living well doesn't cost; it pays! Living well is simple, orderly, and powerful. When you have a strong, reliable foundation of repeated daily habits you achieve more, with less effort, less stress and far less confusion. Remember the KISS formula: Keep It Simple and Stress-free.
And here is your bonus item: In every area of your life, develop benchmarks that let you know you are on the right track. Remember, 'what gets measured, gets done.' Track and benchmark your savings, your fitness, your sales, the time you spend with loved ones, or anything else that is critical to your success. Schedule a date with your spouse. Write it on the calendar, and better yet, put a date on the calendar each week for the next 12 months, then keep your promises!
Create simple charts or graphs to monitor your weight and put them on the wall where the whole family can see your progress and encourage you. Monitor anything and everything that you want to achieve. Even seemingly intangible things like 'peace of mind' can be tracked if you are creative. Simply rate your 'peace of mind' on a scale once a day and write it down. Anything that is important to your success deserves to be benchmarked, tracked and recorded.
Highly successful people have always known this. High achievers monitor their finances. The best sales people record the number of calls them make. Athletes measure their times, their distances and their Earned Run Averages. The numbers may not tell you everything about the quality of your life, but they are an essential tool for moving in the direction you want to go.
And finally, have and work with a mentor. As a professional coach, it's tempting to say, 'hire a coach', but that's not always necessary. Sometimes, a professional coach is the answer, and in that case, the sooner you make the commitment, invest the time and money and energy and get started, the faster you'll achieve your goals. But, whether you hire a professional or not, have and use a coach!
Work with someone who has already achieved what you want to achieve. Ask them to teach you, and schedule regular phone calls or have lunch with them once a week. If you cannot find an expert in your field, then read books, listen to tapes, go to seminars, take classes. Hundreds of people have said my 'Road to Riches' teleclass has been the key to achieving their financial goals. Classes work! Books help! Do whatever it takes to learn from the masters. You cannot afford to spend your life re-inventing the wheel. What others have achieved, you can achieve. But be smart and let them teach you.
Thank you for investing in this series. The cost was 'free' you say? No. I didn't charge you any money for it, but if you've taken it seriously, read and pondered these truths and taken action, you've invested something far more valuable than mere money. You invested your time.
Money is abundant. It can be created. It can be multiplied, replaced or borrowed, and it can grow. As economists say, money is 'elastic'. Your time is not. Time, once invested, is gone forever. Thank you for investing your time, and if you use these lessons well, I believe you'll find your investment will repay you thousands of times over.
Blessings to you, and best wishes for your continued and lasting success!
Phil
___________________________________
Philip E. Humbert, PhD
'Helping You Have Your BEST Year Ever!'
Email: Coach@philiphumbert.com
Web: http://www.philiphumbert.com
(c) Copyright, 2002 by The Philip E. Humbert Group, Inc
All Rights Reserved. You are encouraged to forward or publish
this article in it's entirety, including by-line, contact info and notices
in the margin, but you may not use excerpts or make any changes
without specific written permission from the author and copyright owner.
For over 25 years, I've studied and read, watched and coached highly successful people, from self-made millionaires to professional golfers, to great ministers, parents and entrepreneurs. I've read over 2000 books in psychology, self-help, business, investing, management, leadership and success strategies. I've worked with Fortune 100 companies and I've watched sole proprietors both succeed and fail, and from all of that, I've tried to summarize the 6 Keys that I believe are the are critical, essential elements for long-term success in life.
You've read the Six Keys. You've had time to ponder them. I hope you've taken notes, and perhaps printed and re-read the lessons several times. I hope you've found some points you doubt or disagree with, or some items that in your specific situation might have to be modified to 'fit' just right. But I hope you've also seen the essential truth in each of the points. Let's re-cap them:
You will not achieve your dreams or be successful in life if you fail to take care of yourself. Insist on time for rest, time for fitness, time to review your goals, time to develop your plans and develop better strategies.
Beyond taking care of your body, mind and soul, you will need tools and equipment, skills and resources to achieve your dreams. You will need quiet in which to concentrate. You will need a 'problem free zone' where you can be productive, creative and effective. Highly successful people invest in a Personal Eco-System that lets them function at their best.
Dream big dreams, complete in every detail and rich in sensory cues. High achievers imagine the future exactly the way they want it, then develop plans and strategies to create the life they envision. Set goals. Develop plans. Write them down and review them daily. Once you have a goal and a strategy, pursue it with all your heart, mind, strength and energy. Use your imagination to create the life you want!
Ask better questions. Asking better, more powerful and more interesting questions will transform the quality of your life. Ask yourself, 'How can I?' Ask yourself, 'Who can teach me?' Ask yourself, 'What are my most important values, priorities and goals, and how can I reach them?' Focus on great questions and let the answers pull your forward.
Whatever you desire to achieve, start it today. Take some action in the direction you want to go. Then take another, and another. Action has power and decisiveness in it. Action gives us enthusiasm, builds our confidence and encourages us to go further. Success requires and is based on action. Do it.
Create a lifestyle based on repeated daily habits that reflect your values and your ideals. Living well doesn't cost; it pays! Living well is simple, orderly, and powerful. When you have a strong, reliable foundation of repeated daily habits you achieve more, with less effort, less stress and far less confusion. Remember the KISS formula: Keep It Simple and Stress-free.
And here is your bonus item: In every area of your life, develop benchmarks that let you know you are on the right track. Remember, 'what gets measured, gets done.' Track and benchmark your savings, your fitness, your sales, the time you spend with loved ones, or anything else that is critical to your success. Schedule a date with your spouse. Write it on the calendar, and better yet, put a date on the calendar each week for the next 12 months, then keep your promises!
Create simple charts or graphs to monitor your weight and put them on the wall where the whole family can see your progress and encourage you. Monitor anything and everything that you want to achieve. Even seemingly intangible things like 'peace of mind' can be tracked if you are creative. Simply rate your 'peace of mind' on a scale once a day and write it down. Anything that is important to your success deserves to be benchmarked, tracked and recorded.
Highly successful people have always known this. High achievers monitor their finances. The best sales people record the number of calls them make. Athletes measure their times, their distances and their Earned Run Averages. The numbers may not tell you everything about the quality of your life, but they are an essential tool for moving in the direction you want to go.
And finally, have and work with a mentor. As a professional coach, it's tempting to say, 'hire a coach', but that's not always necessary. Sometimes, a professional coach is the answer, and in that case, the sooner you make the commitment, invest the time and money and energy and get started, the faster you'll achieve your goals. But, whether you hire a professional or not, have and use a coach!
Work with someone who has already achieved what you want to achieve. Ask them to teach you, and schedule regular phone calls or have lunch with them once a week. If you cannot find an expert in your field, then read books, listen to tapes, go to seminars, take classes. Hundreds of people have said my 'Road to Riches' teleclass has been the key to achieving their financial goals. Classes work! Books help! Do whatever it takes to learn from the masters. You cannot afford to spend your life re-inventing the wheel. What others have achieved, you can achieve. But be smart and let them teach you.
Thank you for investing in this series. The cost was 'free' you say? No. I didn't charge you any money for it, but if you've taken it seriously, read and pondered these truths and taken action, you've invested something far more valuable than mere money. You invested your time.
Money is abundant. It can be created. It can be multiplied, replaced or borrowed, and it can grow. As economists say, money is 'elastic'. Your time is not. Time, once invested, is gone forever. Thank you for investing your time, and if you use these lessons well, I believe you'll find your investment will repay you thousands of times over.
Blessings to you, and best wishes for your continued and lasting success!
Phil
___________________________________
Philip E. Humbert, PhD
'Helping You Have Your BEST Year Ever!'
Email: Coach@philiphumbert.com
Web: http://www.philiphumbert.com
(c) Copyright, 2002 by The Philip E. Humbert Group, Inc
All Rights Reserved. You are encouraged to forward or publish
this article in it's entirety, including by-line, contact info and notices
in the margin, but you may not use excerpts or make any changes
without specific written permission from the author and copyright owner.
Monday, February 18, 2008
Happiness - A Byproduct
Happiness is a by-product.
We can't buy it, because it has no price.
Some people try to purchase happiness by getting drunk; others build fine houses, and some travel around the world.
But the goal is as elusive as the horizon.
The main issue in life is service, and happiness is incidental to service.
To try to win happiness from the world without erving the world is like trying to distill gasoline from water instead of from crude oil. It can't be done.
The contractor who erects an honest, substantial building wins happiness.
The statesman who forwards the cause of humanity wins happiness.
The judge who reads the law in the light of common sense wins happiness.
Those reckless fellows who balance themselves on four-inch beams, ten stories above ground, and toss white-hot rivets back and forth, win happiness.
The law of happiness is as inexorable as the law of graviation.
Without service there shall be no happiness, says nature.
And it's a good law, too.
Author unknown
To your happiness!!
Fran Watson
P.S. Having just come back from a meeting at 10:30 pm, this little prayer spoke to me as I sat down at my computer. May it bless you too!
God Bless All Tired Fok Tonight
God bless all tired folk tonight
And give them dreamless sleep;
God bless all lonely, anxious folk
Who in the darkness weep.
God bless all little children thought
They harass us by day;
And old folk, too, and careless folk
Who never kneel to pray.
God bless all those who try and fail,
And all who suffer pain;
God bless all those away from home
And bring them back again.
God bless all honest, patient folk
In cottage and in hall,
And as we need His love and care,
God bless us one and all.
P.P.S. I ask God's special blessing on all soldiers both at home and away. Amen.
We can't buy it, because it has no price.
Some people try to purchase happiness by getting drunk; others build fine houses, and some travel around the world.
But the goal is as elusive as the horizon.
The main issue in life is service, and happiness is incidental to service.
To try to win happiness from the world without erving the world is like trying to distill gasoline from water instead of from crude oil. It can't be done.
The contractor who erects an honest, substantial building wins happiness.
The statesman who forwards the cause of humanity wins happiness.
The judge who reads the law in the light of common sense wins happiness.
Those reckless fellows who balance themselves on four-inch beams, ten stories above ground, and toss white-hot rivets back and forth, win happiness.
The law of happiness is as inexorable as the law of graviation.
Without service there shall be no happiness, says nature.
And it's a good law, too.
Author unknown
To your happiness!!
Fran Watson
P.S. Having just come back from a meeting at 10:30 pm, this little prayer spoke to me as I sat down at my computer. May it bless you too!
God Bless All Tired Fok Tonight
God bless all tired folk tonight
And give them dreamless sleep;
God bless all lonely, anxious folk
Who in the darkness weep.
God bless all little children thought
They harass us by day;
And old folk, too, and careless folk
Who never kneel to pray.
God bless all those who try and fail,
And all who suffer pain;
God bless all those away from home
And bring them back again.
God bless all honest, patient folk
In cottage and in hall,
And as we need His love and care,
God bless us one and all.
P.P.S. I ask God's special blessing on all soldiers both at home and away. Amen.
Saturday, February 16, 2008
5th Grade Philosophy
A fifth grade teacher in a Christian school asked her class to look at TV commercials and see if they could use them in some way to communicate ideas about God.
Here are some of the results: scroll down.
God is like.
BAYER ASPIRIN
He works miracles.
God is like.
a FORD
He's got a better idea.
God is like.
COKE
He's the real thing.
God is like.
HALLMARK CARDS
He cares enough to send His very best.
God is like.
TIDE
He gets the stains out that others leave behind.
God is like.
GENERAL ELECTRIC
He brings good things to life.
God is like.
SEARS
He has everything.
God is like.
ALKA-SELTZER
Try Him, you'll like Him
God is like.
SCOTCH TAPE
You can't see Him, but you know He's there.
God is like.
ALLSTATE
You're in good hands with Him.
God is like.
VO-5 Hair Spray
He holds through all kinds of weather.
God is like.
DIAL SOAP
Aren't you glad you have Him? Don't you wish everybody did?
God is like .
Canada post
Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet nor ice will keep Him from His appointed
destination.
God is like.
Chevrolet. . . .
the heart beat of America
God is like
Maxwell house. . .
Good to the very last drop
God is like.
B o u n ty . . . .
He is the quicker picker upper. . can handle the tough jobs. . .and He won't fall apart on you
BLESSINGS FROM OUR HOUSE TO YOUR HOUSE
Fran Watson
Here are some of the results: scroll down.
God is like.
BAYER ASPIRIN
He works miracles.
God is like.
a FORD
He's got a better idea.
God is like.
COKE
He's the real thing.
God is like.
HALLMARK CARDS
He cares enough to send His very best.
God is like.
TIDE
He gets the stains out that others leave behind.
God is like.
GENERAL ELECTRIC
He brings good things to life.
God is like.
SEARS
He has everything.
God is like.
ALKA-SELTZER
Try Him, you'll like Him
God is like.
SCOTCH TAPE
You can't see Him, but you know He's there.
God is like.
ALLSTATE
You're in good hands with Him.
God is like.
VO-5 Hair Spray
He holds through all kinds of weather.
God is like.
DIAL SOAP
Aren't you glad you have Him? Don't you wish everybody did?
God is like .
Canada post
Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet nor ice will keep Him from His appointed
destination.
God is like.
Chevrolet. . . .
the heart beat of America
God is like
Maxwell house. . .
Good to the very last drop
God is like.
B o u n ty . . . .
He is the quicker picker upper. . can handle the tough jobs. . .and He won't fall apart on you
BLESSINGS FROM OUR HOUSE TO YOUR HOUSE
Fran Watson
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