Take 100% Responsibility for Your Life - STARTING TODAY!
by Jack Canfield
This isn’t a trick question.
Certainly you know the answer—the person who has been responsible for the life you live right now: YOU.
Everything about you is a result of your doing or not doing... Your income. Debt. Relationships. Health. Fitness level. Attitudes and behaviors.
I've often said that you are either creating or allowing everything that is happening in your life.
I think everyone knows this in their hearts, but often times people convince themselves into thinking that external factors are the source of their failure, disappointment, and unhappiness.
External factors do not determine how you live. YOU are in complete control of the quality of your life, by either creating or allowing the circumstances you experience.
When I hear people complain about the state of their life (be it their problems with personal finances, weight, their jobs, or general dissatisfaction), I like to help them see things differently.
If they feel “stuck” and unable to move forward for whatever reason, I ask them to scrutinize both what is working well and what isn’t working well in their life and see how they’ve arrived at where they currently are.
For example, if a woman tells me she’s unhappy with her weight—she travels frequently, and has no to time to exercise or seek healthy foods—I point out that her weight is not a result of her travels and schedule. It’s an outcome of what she chooses to eat and how she chooses to move, regardless of her daily agenda. Why not make a conscious effort to pre-plan healthy meals and snacks, even if it’s on the go, and sneak in 10 minutes here and 10 minutes there to be physically active (hey, I know some frequent flyers that make it a habit of running through airports!).
If you’re frustrated with any area in your life, then it’s time to take a little inventory.
Certainly there are wonderful things happening, whether it’s your job, your romantic relationship, your children, your friends, or your income level. Your accomplishments are just as important as your missteps.
First, congratulate yourself on your successes; and then take a look at what isn’t working out so well. What are you doing or not doing to create those experiences?
Watch out! If you find yourself beginning to complain about everything but the choices you’ve made, then you need to take a step back. See if you can stop blaming outside factors for your unhappiness.
When you realize that you—and only you—create your experiences, you’ll realize that you can un-create them and forge new experiences whenever you want.
How empowering is that!
You must take responsibility for your happiness and your unhappiness, your successes and your failures, your good times and your bad times.
All too often we choose to claim the successes and blame the failures on others or other circumstances. When you stop blaming, however, you can take that energy and redirect it to focus on shaping a better situation for yourself. Blaming only ties up your energy. Imagine roping all the energy into a positive effort.
Some ideas to make this happen:
1. Believe, Believe, Believe! Have unwavering faith in yourself, for good and bad. Make the decision to accept the fact that you create all your experiences. You will experience successes thanks to you, and you will experience pain, struggle, and strife thanks to you. Sounds a little strange, but accepting this level of responsibility is uniquely empowering. It means you can do, change, and be anything. Stumbling blocks become just that—little hills to hop over.
2. Take no less than 100% responsibility . Successful people take full responsibility for the thoughts they think, the images they visualize, and the actions they take. They don't waste their time and energy blaming and complaining. They evaluate their experiences and decide if they need to change them or not. They face the uncomfortable and take risks in order to create the life they want to live.
3. Stop complaining . Look at what you are complaining about. I’m fat. I’m tired. I can’t get out of debt. I won’t ever get a better job. I can’t stand the relationship I have with my sister. I’ll never find a soulmate in life. Really examine your complaints. More than likely you can do something about them. They are not about other people, other things, or other events. They are about YOU.
4. Make an immediate change. Are you unhappy about something that is happening right now? Make requests that will make it more desirable to you, or take the steps to change it yourself. Making a change might be uncomfortable for you. It might mean you have to put in more time, money, and effort. It might mean that someone gets upset about it, or makes you feel bad about your decision. It might be difficult to change or leave a situation, but staying put is your choice so why continue to complain?
You can either do something about it or not. It is your choice and you have responsibility for your choices.
5. Pay attention. Looking to others for help and guidance is helpful, but don’t forget to stay tuned in to yourself—your behavior, attitude, and life experiences. Identify what’s working and what isn’t. If you need to, write it all down. Then…
6. Face the truth and take action for the long term . You have to be willing to change your behavior if you want a different outcome. You have to be willing to take the risks necessary to get what you want. If you’ve already taken an initial step in the right direction, now’s the time to plan additional steps to keep moving you forward, faster.
Isn’t it a great relief to know that you can make your life what you want it to be? Isn’t it wonderful that your successes do not depend on someone else?
If you need just one thing to do different today, than you did yesterday, make it this:
Commit to taking 100% responsibility for every aspect of your life. Decide to make changes, one step at a time. Once you start the process you’ll discover it's much easier to get what you want by taking control of your thoughts, your visualizations, and your actions!
© 2010 Jack Canfield
* * *
Article Used with permission:
Jack Canfield, America's #1 Success Coach, is founder of the billion-dollar book brand Chicken Soup for the Soul© and a leading authority on Peak Performance and Life Success. If you're ready to jump-start your life, make more money, and have more fun and joy in all that you do, get your FREE success tips from Jack Canfield now at: www.FreeSuccessStrategies.com
Are you "stuck" in this area? If you'd like me to personally help you clarify your vision for the year, align your goals with your purpose, and develop a detailed action plan to turn your dream into reality... www.TheSuccessPrinciplesWorkshop.com
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Live Life Today
Do you believe that you have to wait until things calm down a bit before you get your act together?
Do you keep telling yourself that tomorrow you will get at that chore you’ve been putting off, that course you’ve been wanting to take, that phone call you’ve been going to make, take some time to look after yourself, go to the spa, take a hot bath, etc. etc.?
Well then, you are normal. Most of us are waiting until tomorrow, but the truth is, as Sarah Ban Breathnach says, “life never calms down long enough for us to wait until tomorrow to start living the lives we deserve. Life is always movement, always change, always unforeseen circumstances.”
So, what are our options? How do we begin working on this life of ours to make it more satisfying? Sarah says “We can accept, bless, give thanks, and get going. “ Wow, what a concept. Accept things as they are. Give thanks for our circumstances and then just get on with things.
As I read the thought for January 25th from Sarah Ban Brethnach’s Simple Abundance, A Daybook of Comfort and Joy, I was struck by how many things I have let slide. How many times procrastination has crept in and how many opportunities this has cost me. How many times have you had a thought, “I should call so and so”, but then let it slide only to find out later that something happened to that person, they moved away, or they died and that opportunity will never come again. How many friendships have you let slide? How many times have you turned down the chance to do something just for yourself – taking a nice long bath for instance. I can hear you now - “Oh, I couldn’t do that, there is laundry to do, dishes to be done, the house to clean, etc., etc., etc.” Well, those things will always be there. It’s time to stop making excuses. You will NEVER FIND THE TIME to do anything. You need to MAKE THE TIME to do what it is you want to do.
Sarah encouraged me to “Call a friend for lunch, begin to read or even write that novel, organize your papers, try a new recipe for dinner, smile at everyone you meet, sit and dream before a blazing fire, pick up your needlepoint again, act as if you’re grateful to be alive, scatter joy.” Simple things to get us started on LIVING out life instead of letting it pass us by.
Now it is your turn. Think for a moment about one thing that you can do that will bring you genuine pleasure…and then do it.
Think about one thing that will move your business forward…and then do it.
Think about one thing that will improve your relationship (if you are in one)….and then do it.
Simple things, and easy to do…IF we just go ahead and do them.
What will you do today????
Fran Watson
Do you keep telling yourself that tomorrow you will get at that chore you’ve been putting off, that course you’ve been wanting to take, that phone call you’ve been going to make, take some time to look after yourself, go to the spa, take a hot bath, etc. etc.?
Well then, you are normal. Most of us are waiting until tomorrow, but the truth is, as Sarah Ban Breathnach says, “life never calms down long enough for us to wait until tomorrow to start living the lives we deserve. Life is always movement, always change, always unforeseen circumstances.”
So, what are our options? How do we begin working on this life of ours to make it more satisfying? Sarah says “We can accept, bless, give thanks, and get going. “ Wow, what a concept. Accept things as they are. Give thanks for our circumstances and then just get on with things.
As I read the thought for January 25th from Sarah Ban Brethnach’s Simple Abundance, A Daybook of Comfort and Joy, I was struck by how many things I have let slide. How many times procrastination has crept in and how many opportunities this has cost me. How many times have you had a thought, “I should call so and so”, but then let it slide only to find out later that something happened to that person, they moved away, or they died and that opportunity will never come again. How many friendships have you let slide? How many times have you turned down the chance to do something just for yourself – taking a nice long bath for instance. I can hear you now - “Oh, I couldn’t do that, there is laundry to do, dishes to be done, the house to clean, etc., etc., etc.” Well, those things will always be there. It’s time to stop making excuses. You will NEVER FIND THE TIME to do anything. You need to MAKE THE TIME to do what it is you want to do.
Sarah encouraged me to “Call a friend for lunch, begin to read or even write that novel, organize your papers, try a new recipe for dinner, smile at everyone you meet, sit and dream before a blazing fire, pick up your needlepoint again, act as if you’re grateful to be alive, scatter joy.” Simple things to get us started on LIVING out life instead of letting it pass us by.
Now it is your turn. Think for a moment about one thing that you can do that will bring you genuine pleasure…and then do it.
Think about one thing that will move your business forward…and then do it.
Think about one thing that will improve your relationship (if you are in one)….and then do it.
Simple things, and easy to do…IF we just go ahead and do them.
What will you do today????
Fran Watson
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Saving Your Dream
Thirty Minutes That Will Save Your Dream
by Suzanne Falter-Barns
www.getknownnow.com
If you've got a dream you're intent on pursuing, chances are you're going to bog
down at some point. That's just the way dreams are. In fact, there's a little known
rule about this called the Second Rule of Thermodynamics, which states that sooner
or later everything returns to chaos.
In other words, expect your dream to come crashing down around your ears
periodically.
Yet, no need to despair; such meltdowns are actually good for your dream, because
they force you to stop and rethink your approach if you want to continue. That's the
only way you can find the footing to continue, and in that process, you're forced to
learn and grow. This is when I always pull out my trusty guided visualizations.
Nothing, but nothing, can turn your mind around quite as effectively as a good
guided visualization. It can create hope where there was none, clarity in a space of
confusion, and immeasurable inspiration. If you subscribe to the same notion that I
do – that all of our ideas and instincts around our dream are guided – then this is
where you'll find the mother lode of such information. A good guided visualization
will connect you with deep inner truths that most of us simply can't tap into
consciously.
So basically, you, too, can be a Ghandi or a Nelson Mandela or a Thich Nacht Hahn …
if you dig deep enough and surrender fully enough. (Those enlightened souls have
taught us that such round-the-clock access to the spiritual goods requires one heck
of a lot of meditation, not to mention a saintly obfuscation of the ego.) In the
meanwhile, the next best thing is to turn on the guided visualizations.
By guided visualization, I mean a recording of someone leading you through a
meditation. First they relax you; then they help you imagine yourself in a particular
place, or having a certain experience. A great guided visualization will lead you into situations where anything can happen and anyone can show up. You simply sit back
and observe as helpers show up, insights are gained, and instructions are received.
Sometimes the path you see is a familiar one you've imagined often with your
conscious mind, and the meditation serves as a wonderful confirmation of your plan.
Yet, other times it can be strange and dark, making no sense whatsoever. My own
students have come to me with alarm when they saw a picture of chaos, or violence
and degradation. And yet, in talking it over later, they usually recognize a deeper
meaning to the picture. Over time, if they repeat the process, they are often left with a greater insight than they anticipated.
For instance, Rosemary was a frustrated writer who hated her daytime job, and was
given to fits of gallows humor about it. When she first did my Discover Your Soul
Purpose meditation, she uncovered a chaotic back alley, full of lurking, menacing
figures. She did the meditation several more times and the situation only marginally
improved. Yet, what Rosemary took away from the experience was that her life was
out of balance, and filled with dark, negative energy. She quit her job, attended to
her failing health, and re-approached the meditation some months later. Now the
scene was remarkably different, a sunny courtyard in which she could see herself as
a writer for the first time.
In fact, Rosemary had not ‘done the meditation wrong', as she'd been quick to
assume. ("I must be the only person who didn't do this thing right!") Instead, her
soul was giving her a direct signal that she was tangled up in life circumstances that were obscuring her dream. The meditation, for all of its supposed lack of clarity, had really been clear as a bell.
The only real way to interpret the images we get in these visualizations is to check in with our gut. There may be age-old gypsy wisdom that water means good luck, or
that a duck is an omen of impending death … but I say that's all poppycock. The
only person who knows what your visualization means is you; your gut is the only thing that should ever guide your interpretation. What is it telling you about
what you saw -- that you need balance, like the confused Rosemary? Or that you
need courage? Could it be that you simply don't want to admit that what you saw is
actually true?
Often we get images of ourselves leading such a life of power and abundance that we
can barely stand it. It brings tears to our eyes as we acknowledge that we really can
do that thing we sorely wish to begin. In that instant, we see how small and
constrained we've allowed ourselves to become; yet, we also see how much impact
we could have, if only we could choose the right path.
Above all, guided visualizations give us permission to dream. They allow us to see
ourselves graphically living a different life, feeling the feelings, smelling the smells, and owning the power. We see a higher, truer aspect of ourselves, and in that
instant, understand how unstoppable we really can be.
This is the biggest reason I rely on guided visualizations in my work – because they
take you beyond the sugary platitudes about ‘going for it' and ‘reaching for the
stars'. Instead, they deliver you smack into your dream for a moment, so you can
see the impact and importance of what you're here to do.
Once you really know the true rightness of what that feels like, down deep in your
gut, nothing can keep from making that vision a reality. Even if the images you see
are more fleeting or obscure, they will leave you brushed with truth. This is the
wisdom that lurks in our bones; wisdom we can access simply by taking the time to
turn on a visualization.
Learn more about guided visualizations at http://www.howmuchjoy.com/soulpurpose.html
©2005 Suzanne Falter-Barns.. www.howmuchjoy.com & www.getknownnow.com
For information on how to find the time, energy, money to live your purpose in life,
download Suzanne’s free workbook, The Living Your Joy Companion Workbook
And get a daily blast of joyful tips from the Blast o’ Joy blog at www.blastojoy.com
To reprint this article, please use with this bio box intact. Thanks!
Here's to keeping your dream alive!!
Fran
by Suzanne Falter-Barns
www.getknownnow.com
If you've got a dream you're intent on pursuing, chances are you're going to bog
down at some point. That's just the way dreams are. In fact, there's a little known
rule about this called the Second Rule of Thermodynamics, which states that sooner
or later everything returns to chaos.
In other words, expect your dream to come crashing down around your ears
periodically.
Yet, no need to despair; such meltdowns are actually good for your dream, because
they force you to stop and rethink your approach if you want to continue. That's the
only way you can find the footing to continue, and in that process, you're forced to
learn and grow. This is when I always pull out my trusty guided visualizations.
Nothing, but nothing, can turn your mind around quite as effectively as a good
guided visualization. It can create hope where there was none, clarity in a space of
confusion, and immeasurable inspiration. If you subscribe to the same notion that I
do – that all of our ideas and instincts around our dream are guided – then this is
where you'll find the mother lode of such information. A good guided visualization
will connect you with deep inner truths that most of us simply can't tap into
consciously.
So basically, you, too, can be a Ghandi or a Nelson Mandela or a Thich Nacht Hahn …
if you dig deep enough and surrender fully enough. (Those enlightened souls have
taught us that such round-the-clock access to the spiritual goods requires one heck
of a lot of meditation, not to mention a saintly obfuscation of the ego.) In the
meanwhile, the next best thing is to turn on the guided visualizations.
By guided visualization, I mean a recording of someone leading you through a
meditation. First they relax you; then they help you imagine yourself in a particular
place, or having a certain experience. A great guided visualization will lead you into situations where anything can happen and anyone can show up. You simply sit back
and observe as helpers show up, insights are gained, and instructions are received.
Sometimes the path you see is a familiar one you've imagined often with your
conscious mind, and the meditation serves as a wonderful confirmation of your plan.
Yet, other times it can be strange and dark, making no sense whatsoever. My own
students have come to me with alarm when they saw a picture of chaos, or violence
and degradation. And yet, in talking it over later, they usually recognize a deeper
meaning to the picture. Over time, if they repeat the process, they are often left with a greater insight than they anticipated.
For instance, Rosemary was a frustrated writer who hated her daytime job, and was
given to fits of gallows humor about it. When she first did my Discover Your Soul
Purpose meditation, she uncovered a chaotic back alley, full of lurking, menacing
figures. She did the meditation several more times and the situation only marginally
improved. Yet, what Rosemary took away from the experience was that her life was
out of balance, and filled with dark, negative energy. She quit her job, attended to
her failing health, and re-approached the meditation some months later. Now the
scene was remarkably different, a sunny courtyard in which she could see herself as
a writer for the first time.
In fact, Rosemary had not ‘done the meditation wrong', as she'd been quick to
assume. ("I must be the only person who didn't do this thing right!") Instead, her
soul was giving her a direct signal that she was tangled up in life circumstances that were obscuring her dream. The meditation, for all of its supposed lack of clarity, had really been clear as a bell.
The only real way to interpret the images we get in these visualizations is to check in with our gut. There may be age-old gypsy wisdom that water means good luck, or
that a duck is an omen of impending death … but I say that's all poppycock. The
only person who knows what your visualization means is you; your gut is the only thing that should ever guide your interpretation. What is it telling you about
what you saw -- that you need balance, like the confused Rosemary? Or that you
need courage? Could it be that you simply don't want to admit that what you saw is
actually true?
Often we get images of ourselves leading such a life of power and abundance that we
can barely stand it. It brings tears to our eyes as we acknowledge that we really can
do that thing we sorely wish to begin. In that instant, we see how small and
constrained we've allowed ourselves to become; yet, we also see how much impact
we could have, if only we could choose the right path.
Above all, guided visualizations give us permission to dream. They allow us to see
ourselves graphically living a different life, feeling the feelings, smelling the smells, and owning the power. We see a higher, truer aspect of ourselves, and in that
instant, understand how unstoppable we really can be.
This is the biggest reason I rely on guided visualizations in my work – because they
take you beyond the sugary platitudes about ‘going for it' and ‘reaching for the
stars'. Instead, they deliver you smack into your dream for a moment, so you can
see the impact and importance of what you're here to do.
Once you really know the true rightness of what that feels like, down deep in your
gut, nothing can keep from making that vision a reality. Even if the images you see
are more fleeting or obscure, they will leave you brushed with truth. This is the
wisdom that lurks in our bones; wisdom we can access simply by taking the time to
turn on a visualization.
Learn more about guided visualizations at http://www.howmuchjoy.com/soulpurpose.html
©2005 Suzanne Falter-Barns.. www.howmuchjoy.com & www.getknownnow.com
For information on how to find the time, energy, money to live your purpose in life,
download Suzanne’s free workbook, The Living Your Joy Companion Workbook
And get a daily blast of joyful tips from the Blast o’ Joy blog at www.blastojoy.com
To reprint this article, please use with this bio box intact. Thanks!
Here's to keeping your dream alive!!
Fran
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