Don't Worry...Be Happy

Genuine Happiness Comes from Within

Sometimes, when we feel like the world is just too heavy, we look around and find people who continued to live fascinating and wonderful lives. And then thoughts come popping into our minds like bubbles from nowhere – “How did their life become so adorably sweet? How come they still can manage to laugh and play around despite a busy stressful life?” 

As we pause and observe for awhile we may realize that they started to work on a place called ‘self’.

So, how does one become genuinely happy? Step 1 is to love yourself.

A theology professor once said that “loving means accepting.”  To love oneself means to accept that you are not a perfect being, but behind the imperfections must lie a great ounce of courage to be able to discover ways on how to improve our repertoire to recover from our mistakes.

Genuine happiness also pertains to contentment. When you are contented with the job you have, the way you look, with your family, your friends, the place you live in, your car, and all the things you now have – truly, you know the answer to the question “how to be genuinely happy.”

When we begin to discover a small start somewhere from within, that small start will eventually lead to something else, and to something else. But if you keep questioning life like  and looking for the negative in everything, you will never be able to find genuine happiness.

I believe that life is about finding out about trying and failing, wining and losing, right and wrong. These are things that happen as often as you inhale and exhale. Failure in a person’s life has become as abundant and necessary as air. But this should not hinder us from becoming happy.

You may be at a down point in your life at the moment and wonder, how can we be genuinely happy in spite all these?

Take one step at a time.

Every time you exert an effort to improve the quality of life and your being, whether it is cleaning up your room, helping a friend, taking care of your sick dog, failing on board exams and trying again, life gives you equivalent points for that.

Imagine life as a big score board like those which are used in the NFLs. Every time you take a step forward, you make scoring points. Wouldn’t it be nice to look at that board at the end of each game and think to yourself “Whew! I got a point today. I’m glad I gave it a shot.”, instead of looking at it all blank and murmur “Geez, I didn’t even hit a score today. I wish I had the guts to try out. We could have won!” and then walk away.

Genuine happiness isn’t about driving the hottest Formula 1 car, nor getting the employee of the year award, earning the highest 13th month pay, or beating the sales quota. Sometimes, the most sought after prizes in life don’t always go to the fastest, the strongest, the bravest or not even the best.

So, how do you become genuinely happy? 

Every one has their own definition of ‘happiness’. Happiness for a writer may mean launching a best selling book. Happiness for a basketball rookie may mean getting the rookie of the year award. Happiness for a beggar may mean finding a lot of money. Happiness for a business man may mean corporate success.

So, really now, how do we become genuinely happy? Simple. Its about doing and making the best out of every single thing. You don’t have to have the best things in this world. When you find yourself smiling at your own mistake and telling your self “Oh, I’ll do better next time”, your willingness to stand up again and try – that will make you a genuinely happy person.

When you learn to accept yourself and your own faults. You pass step 1 in the project “how to become genuinely happy”.

Love and accept others as you love yourself.  Laugh at your foibles.  Be empathetic and kind to others.  Do something for someone else and do something for yourself.  Don't give so much away that you have nothing left for you.  It takes courage to be happy.  Be of good courage.

BANABU

Fran Watson

"Un"? What is an "un"?

Have you ever had an "un" day?  A day when you felt unappreciated, unwanted, unknown, unloved?  It could be that you are too busy and have gotten too tired.  It's easy to do.  Our lives can easily become overwhelming if we let the outside world take over.  We have constant demands to "do this", "go here", "buy this", "watch this",.  It can make us crazy. 

When our lives are too busy it is easy to neglect the one person who should be upheld and supported - ourselves.  We become unable to cope. If we don't take care of ourselves, we can't take care of anyone else properly.  We've seen the ads about how to put the oxygen mask on yourself first before trying to help anyone else and in the Bible Jesus said "love your neighbour as yourself".  If you don't love and care for yourself, how can you truly love and take care of your neighbour?

If we spend too much time in an "un" stage, we may end up with a feeling of depression that is difficult to get out of.  We may need to consult a professional to help us.  If you are feeling a little "un" today, take a look at what you have been doing lately.  Have you been "doing" instead of "being"?  We are "human beings" not "human doings".  It is important to take some time to relax and "unwind", to move from "unconscious" to conscious as we understand what it is we are doing to ourselves when we allow ourselves to become too busy.

When this happens, when you feel unappreciated, it's time to appreciate yourself for who you are and what you do, but you can't do this if you are constantly rushing around.  You need to give yourself a break.  Take some time to yourself.  Sit down with a cup of tea or coffee and think about all the things you have done.  Think about the times that people have said thank you for things you have done or said.  Think about the things you have done for others and be grateful that you were able to do what you have done. 

If you can, give yourself some time to find out what you like to do.  Spend a morning thinking about the things that you "don't have time for" and figure out ways to make that time.  Be unavailable for a little while. 

We speak about "carving out" time for ourselves, and sometimes that is what it feels like, that we have to see our busyness as a block of marble that needs to be reshaped to reveal its true nature.  We need to carve away the unneccessary and keep only what brings us joy and peace and love.

 

BANABU

 

Fran Watson

Time Management

I sit here this morning feeling good about some of the things I have done recently, like learning how to set up posts on Facebook so that each hour there is a post, and being more dedicated to posting on my blog. 

However when I got up this morning and realized that today is the 4th and that in order to get paid at the end of the month my invoices need to be in by Monday, my heart sank.  It is unlikely that Canada Post will get my package there in time. 

But I can't really blame them.  It was my lack of time management, of setting a note in my Day Timer earlier in the week that said "Do Closures". 

I am self-employed, working from home, on contract with an EAP.  Each month I have to have my closures in by the 7th and the 23rd in order to get paid on time.  If I had perfected my Time Management skills, I would never have to work.  Alas, despite the fact that I teach Time Management skills, I sometimes fail.

That's the way it is in the world.  Often despite our best intentions, we fail.  So what we need to do is fail forward.  Take a look at what happened and take steps to ensure that it won't happen again.  So today I am entering a note into my Day Timer on the 18th of this month that says "Closures".  That will ensure that I will get them done on time.

Right now I will get back to working on my closures and send them away today with hope and prayers that they will arrive in time.

BANABU

Fran Watson

P.S.  If you would like some information on Time Management, or get a copy of a Time Management log, email me or comment below

Motivation

ABCs of  MOTIVATION, THE HEART OF SELF IMPROVEMENT

A - Action.  Take action to create the life you want.  Avoid negative people, things and places. Achieve your dreams. Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “the future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”

B - Believe in yourself, and in what you can do.

C – Consider every angle and aspect of a situation. Motivation comes from determination. Once you have conceived the solution, take action.

D – Determination.  Don’t give up and don’t give in. Thomas Edison failed over and over again before he came up with his invention and perfected the incandescent light bulb.

E – Enjoy life. Work as if you don’t need money. Dance as if nobody’s watching. Love as if you never cried. Learn as if you’ll live forever. Motivation is easier when you are happy.

F – Family and Friends – are life’s greatest ‘F’ treasures. Don’t lose sight of them.

G – Give more than what is expected.  

H – Hang on to your dreams. These little stars will be your driving force.

I – Ignore those who try to destroy you. Don’t let other people to get the best of you. Stay away from toxic people – the kind of friends who hates to hear about your success and only wants to talk about their failures..

J – Joy. Experience joy in some form everyday. 

K – keep trying no matter how hard life may seem. Take one step at a time, putting one foot in front of the other, one day at a time.

L – Learn to love yourself. Sometimes this may be difficult, but look at things you do well, ask people what they like about you and really listen to what they say.

M – Maintain your momentum. Make things happen. Motivation is putting your dreams into work clothes.

N – Never lie, cheat or steal. .

O – Optimism -look for the positive in every situation..

P – Positivism.  Practice makes perfect. Prepare for your future.

Q – Quitters never win. And winners never quit. Get started now.

R – Regrets - get rid of them.  Ready yourself to move forward.

S – Smile.  It is amazing how much a smile can change your day and also other people's days.  Share your smile with everyone you meet. 

T – Thoughts.  Take control of your thoughts and you take control of your life.

U – Understand others. Seek first to understand and then to be understood. 

V – Visualize what you want for your life.  Really visualize ALL of it - what you want, what you need.

W – Want it more than anything. If you want it enough, you will achieve it.

X – X-tra The "X Factor" is what will make you different from the others. When you are motivated, you tend to find time for “extras” in your life like extra time for family, extra help at work, extra care for friends, and so on.

Y – YOU are unique. No one in this world looks, acts, or talks like you. Value your life and existence.

Z – Zero in on your dreams and go for it!!!

To your personal success

Fran Watson