Change For The Better

"Change for the Better"
By Edel Jarboe

(Click here to read this article online:
http://www.selfhelpforher.com/newsletter154.htm)

The key to changing your life for the better lies in your
willingness to change. It lies in your willingness to let go of
past failures, mistakes, and fears and to embrace your future.
Letting go of self-limiting beliefs and behavior, however, is
difficult because we are often not even aware that we are the
ones holding ourselves back from our happiness. Instead, we
blame our circumstances and other people. But if you are
committed to making your life work you have to be honest with
yourself starting right now. You have to examine the reasons why
you seem to find yourself stuck in a life rut and you have to be
brave and take positive steps to change your life for the better.

== Change Your Habits, Change Your Life ==
The first step is to let go of old habits, beliefs, and routines
that keep you feeling trapped in your life. In other words, pack
up what isn't working for you anymore-emotionally, physically,
financially, etc-- and make room for new dreams and challenges.
Pack up your fears, failures, and disappointments as well because
these are what keep us feeling as if we have no control over our
happiness. And in order to free yourself to reach for your
dreams with confidence you have to break free of your fears and
self-imposed limitations.

In other words, you must challenge your inner obstacles by doing
what you fear. Stop being so hard on yourself and adopt the
attitude that you are in this for the long haul and learn to take
setbacks in stride. Instead of beating yourself up, give
yourself points for having the courage to try and for having the
courage to be true to yourself. Then get back up and try again.
Don't give up on yourself or your happiness just because you
didn't succeed on your first, second, or third try. Keep
believing in yourself and in your dreams and keep on until you
reach your goals.

== Change From Within ==
Too often we stubbornly cling to what isn't working in the hopes
that things will change on their own. But realistically the only
thing that you can change is you. You can change your
perspective on a situation by changing your beliefs and
attitudes. You can change how you choose to deal with the
situation. And, most importantly, you can change how you look at
yourself and your happiness. You can choose to believe that you
deserve to be happy and that you are capable of making your
happiness a reality.

On the other hand, clinging to rigid ideas of what life is
supposed to be like, to what is supposed to make you happy is how
you set yourself up for disappointment and end up in a life rut.
Be willing to let what is going to happen, happen. In order to
make a positive change in your life you have to change your
attitude. Happiness doesn't always come in the package we either
want or expect it to. Instead of wishing that things were
different, better, or easier practice acceptance and consciously
make the most of the tools and resources that are available to
you right now. Sometimes "you" have to make things work out the
way you want them to.

== Dig Out of A Mental Rut ==
Stop using past failures and disappointments as a predictor of
future success. This is a big happiness trap because we give up
before we have even begun to dream. Nurture a belief in yourself
and in your ability to create your own happiness. The way things
are is not the way things have to be.

Again, when we get rid of self-limiting beliefs and self
defeating behavior we make room for personal empowerment and
success. So don't be afraid to embrace new challenges and
opportunities in order to make your dreams a reality. You are
what you think and what you believe about yourself. It is
therefore up to you to take responsibility for your life in the
present moment and to stop making excuses for your unhappiness.
It is up to you to change your life for the better.

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QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF------------------------------------------------------------
1. What past failures or disappointments are you hiding behind?
What can you do to get out of this mental rut? What needs to
happen in order for you to learn and grow from this experience
instead of using it as an excuse?

2. How are you holding yourself back from your happiness? Which
habits and beliefs are keeping you stuck? Which habits and
beliefs do you need to replace them with?

3. Are you shying away from new opportunities and challenges?
What fear are you afraid to face and why? What would happen in
your life if you were to confront and conquer this fear? How
would your perception of yourself change? How would your life
change?

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